Obviously babies need helicopter parenting for safety and security. However, too much helicopter parenting as children grow up is not a good thing. The desire to be a helicopter parent is impulsive. We all want to make sure that are children are safe and happy. However, if we shelter our kids, take on their challenges and make their decisions, we take away their opportunities to learn, develop and grow.
Children need to make poor decisions, learn from natural consequences and sometimes they just need to fail. Making mistakes will allow them to develop logical responsibilities and help them to make the right decisions in the future. Over-parenting deprives kids of their independence and the self-worth that is created from making your own choices.
From sports to academics, you can encourage your children to succeed without taking over every last detail of their lives. It's important to stay involved with your child while allowing him/her to grow into a mature adult. Staying up all night doing your son's school project or moving your daughter to a new class if she has difficulty with a teacher does nothing to help their future. You might be solidifying your friendship with your child. However, your primary role is to parent and guide your kids, not befriend them.
The one positive aspect of helicopter parenting is that parents always know what's happening in their children's lives. However, the negatives can be many. Helicopter parenting leads to children becoming dependent on your advice, your time and your money. They may become so dependent that you'll still be helicopter parenting well into their college years and beyond. Additionally, many children will begin to rebel against their helicopter parents as they get older. You can avoid being a helicopter parent by:
Helicopter parents are far too involved in every aspect of their children's lives. By smothering kids, you leave them very little space to develop their own problem-solving skills and self-esteem. If you are a helicopter parent, make a conscious effort to back off a little bit to allow your child to grow.
Speaking of helicopter parenting, check out our fabulous book pick, Night Road by Kristin Hannah, a great fiction read that raises questions about motherhood, helicopter parenting and tells the unforgettable story about one family and the pain of loss and power of forgiveness. Head to our new SheKnows Book Lounge now.
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