Things You Should Never Say
Make sure you memorize this list, so you don't get caught saying these things grandparents should never say to their grandchildren.
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'Your essay sounds brilliant to me. Obviously your teacher is an idiot.'
One of the sadder phenomena of recent years is the assumption that when a teacher says anything critical of a student, it is assumed the teacher is wrong. This, along with really lousy pay, makes me marvel at why anyone wants to be a teacher. Don't try to make points with your little genius by undermining the lesson his teacher is trying to impart. That is, unless you want the reincarnation of James Dean for a grandchild.
'If I ever find out you have a tattoo I'll kill myself.'
Talk about guilt! This is right up there with our parents' version of 'Finish your broccoli. Don't you know the children in Europe/Bangladesh/Ethiopia are starving!'
'That lovely little girl, the one I met at your house last week, is she your girlfriend?'
Without question, you are on very thin ice here. Absolutely nothing is more embarrassing to a 7- to-14-year-old boy or girl than the outing of his or her social life.
'Of course you should have a curfew for your prom, dear. I remember your mother stayed out very late at her senior prom. I ended up having to take her to visit that so-called doctor on Railroad Street.'
Agreeing with the parents that the child needs a curfew is a smart move for a grandparent. But don't let your support turn into the launching pad for a story best forgotten.
'You hardly ever call me, and you know, Granny's not getting any younger. As a matter of fact, if you ever come over to see me, I'd like you to choose a few things you'd particularly like to have, so when I'm gone, you can take them.'
Oh, boy! Passive/aggressive in the extreme. It's the stuff of nightmares, not to mention years of intense psychoanalysis. Are you happy now?
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