When your mornings consist of looking for an errant toddler shoe for 30 minutes and your nightly soundtrack is a chorus of But I'm not tiiired, then you can use a laugh. Here are this week's funniest tweets from parents. Rest easy, moms and dads, knowing you're not going at this crazy parenting thing alone — but Godspeed, friend.
"I'm so glad I got here 20 minutes early" and other things toddler parents never say.— Jennifer S. White (@yenniwhite) November 14, 2016
Parents: name your kids things that are cool enough to be the name of a laser-tag team one day. Dongforce. Venom-Squadron. Murder Posse.— Tragic Ally (@TragicAllyHere) November 14, 2016
I love it when my kids ask deep philosophical questions like, "Is it tomorrow now?"— Mama Got Bamboozled (@MamaBamboozled) November 13, 2016
On the 7th day she rested. Just kidding. On the 7th day she did more laundry and cleaned the house.— MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable) November 13, 2016
No one is as loud as the one who didn't put the kids to sleep.— Dragging Feeties (@DraggingFeeties) November 15, 2016
My family's mad I ate all the chocolate cake so I'm going to the store to buy more cake, little do they know imma eat all of this cake too.— Sweatpants Cher (@House_Feminist) November 15, 2016
Becoming a mom means adding...— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) November 14, 2016
On your To-Do List for all eternity.
The main parenting difference between fathers and mothers is their willingness to allow their son to go pee in the backyard.— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) November 13, 2016
That didn't count!— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) November 16, 2016
Ok, this one counts.
Oops, I didn't mean that
-my 6yo shooting hoops
-Trump reviewing his campaign promises
4-year-old: How many tacos are there in the world?— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) November 16, 2016
4: That’s what I thought.
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