So, what is your family going to be for Halloween this year?
No, I don’t mean what are your kids going to be. That’s so quaint. And no, obviously, you are not allowed to just slap on a semi-ironic witch hat for the third year in a row.
What I mean is, what is your family costume, your group costume? Because if you’re not doing a family getup, what on earth are you even doing?
You know what I’m talking about. You are Princess Leia, your husband is Han Solo, the older kid is Chewie and the baby is Yoda. Maybe you are a hot dog, your husband is a hamburger and the baby is a ketchup bottle. Or, you and the kids are the four seasons or something — that’s, of course, if you’re barely trying.
Why are we doing group costumes now? Because by getting a group costume together, you demonstrate the following things:
Now, assuming you are able to prove the previous five points, there is only one other hurdle you need to jump: the threat of other moms who are even more clever, organized and maternal than you are. So consider a few options to throw your enemies off.
Whatever you do, don’t take your eye off the prize. Halloween is not for kids, and it’s not for fun. It’s a contest, and you are going to crush it this year.
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