Parents aren't scared of Haunted Hayrides-we're used to sticky people jumping out of the dark while yelling & poking us with weird objects.— Domestic Goddess (@DomesticGoddss) October 5, 2015
Like Hansel and Gretel, I follow the trail of crumbs, only the path leads to the piece of furniture that has been ruined by my toddler— Tired Working Mom (@WorkingMom86) October 6, 2015
Trust me. Leaving a cup you drank milk out of just sitting in your room for a week is the coolest. - My kid giving advice to other kids— KC of TX (@kcmoore51) October 8, 2015
"Dear God, please give me super powers, Amen." -my 4 year old's bedtime prayer— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) October 8, 2015
Literally the only time 4 year olds aren't hungry is when they're sitting in front of a plate of food at a table.— HauntedHouseFeminist (@House_Feminist) October 6, 2015
I envy that my parents could just say "I don't know", and not have to look up 1,000 random questions a day on Google.— Father With Twins (@FatherWithTwins) October 7, 2015
I'm not aiming for "Mother of the Year" so much as "not getting sued by my future adult child for emotional distress".— Tanya Duncan (@SpoolandThimble) October 5, 2015
Me: And the award for the most awesome daddy goes to...? *6 blinks M: The most awesome daddy award goes to...? *6 blinks M: 6: Luke's dad?— Now Watch Me Meh Meh (@TheAlexNevil) October 8, 2015
Dear Son, Repeating, "I'M WAITING! I'M WAITING! I'M WAITING! I'M WAITING! I'M WAITING! I’M WAITING!" doesn't count as waiting. Love, Dad— Brent Almond (@DesignerDaddy) October 5, 2015
Bought a water at the airport and now one of my kids can't go to college.— The Swedish El Jefe (@dxblarssonENG) October 6, 2015
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