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Living with a toddler is like watching a horror movie every day

Megan is a former divorce attorney turned SAHM to twin boys. She's written for The Stir, Scary Mommy, Rare.us, Mommyish and Bustle.

9 Ways life with a toddler is (almost) exactly like living in a scary movie

If you're the parent of a toddler, and you sit down to watch a scary movie this month, don't be alarmed if you experience a strong sense of déjà vu.

Parents of young kids don't get a lot of down time. But October is the season for scary movies, and if you do get a chance to turn on the tube, odds are high that you'll see a horror film or two while channel surfing. If the frightening scenes before you look really familiar, it could be because you're basically watching your own life play out on the screen. In many ways, raising a toddler is like being the star of your very own scary movie.

But don't take our word for it — here's proof: 

More: Baby names from your favorite Halloween movies

1. Marker, pasta sauce... or something more sinister?

9 Ways life with a toddler is (almost) exactly like living in a scary movie
Image: Giphy

The set of a horror film and your dining room carpet are both covered in unidentifiable stains that will take some serious scrubbing to get out.

2. Time to call the exorcist.

9 Ways life with a toddler is (almost) exactly like living in a scary movie
Image: Giphy

Spontaneous puking, random flailing of limbs, seemingly impossible body contortions: Sometimes it's hard to tell if you're dealing with a typical toddler tantrum or watching a scary movie about a demon. Either way, it couldn't hurt to sprinkle some water on them and see what happens.

3. No spooky soundtrack required.

9 Ways life with a toddler is (almost) exactly like living in a scary movie
Image: Giphy

Parents of toddlers can finally breathe easy during the Halloween season as it's the one time of year that they can open the windows without the neighbors thinking someone is being tortured inside. Your child's shrieks of joy and frustration will simply make them think you're watching a Saw marathon.

4. Costume changes are rare.

9 Ways life with a toddler is (almost) exactly like living in a scary movie
Image: Giphy

Main characters in scary movies never seem to have the time to stop and change clothes as they are far too busy running for their lives. Spending your days chasing after a toddler can also result in forgetting the last time you swapped out your yoga pants for a fresh pair.

More: 7 Thoughts every parent has during a toddler tantrum

5. Lots of running around in the dark.

9 Ways life with a toddler is (almost) exactly like living in a scary movie
Image: Giphy

People in scary movies are always stumbling around in the dark and tripping over things right as the killer is gaining on them. We might not have a monster breathing down our necks, but every parent of a young child has bumbled across a dark house and into an end table or two while on a middle-of-the-night mission to find a missing binkie.

6. Nighttime visitors.

9 Ways life with a toddler is (almost) exactly like living in a scary movie
Image: Giphy

You know those creepy scenes in horror films when a little ghost child comes into the room in the middle of the night to watch a sleeping adult? Parents of toddlers awake to this terrifying sight on a regular basis, but instead of vanishing with the flick of a lamp switch, our midnight company demands milk and time in the big bed.

7. Is that Latin?

9 Ways life with a toddler is (almost) exactly like living in a scary movie
Image: Giphy

An overexcited toddler and a possessed character in a scary movie often sound like they're reading from the exact same script.

8. You're constantly nervous.

9 Ways life with a toddler is (almost) exactly like living in a scary movie
Image: Giphy

The trepidation you feel when waiting for one child to catch their sibling's cold is the same as one feels when waiting for the killer to come flying out of the bushes in a slasher flick.

More: Are you raising a psychopath? This simple test could tell

9. You're on the lookout for monsters.

9 Ways life with a toddler is (almost) exactly like living in a scary movie
Image: Giphy

In both scary movies and parenting, there's a lot of peeking under the bed and into shadowy closets. At least when playing the role of heroic mom or dad fending off the boogie man, you know you're not going to find anything... or will you?

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