1. This is exactly how it feels.
Napoleon Dynamite tossing slop and screaming at the llama "EAT YOUR FOOD" except it's me feeding my kids breakfast before school.— Marl Beans (@Marlebean) October 1, 2015
2. We've all had that creeping suspicion.
I'm willing to bet one of those "to the mom whose toddler was having a tantrum" blog posts was posted after seeing me with my toddler.— Lauren (@WorkingMom86) September 28, 2015
3. This kid has serious vision.
[4:52 a.m.] 6yo: mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy what if our whole house was one giant churro. Me:— JFlo (@MamaFlores) October 1, 2015
4. Light-up shoes make everything right.
me: Go to your room *9 stomps away* me: Come back and do it right *puts on light up shoes* *turns light off* *stomps away* me:That's better!— Josh (@iwearaonesie) September 29, 2015
5. This app could serve a purpose for parents.
"Fed my kids gluten. Two stars." - #Peeple reviews by moms— Ashley Austrew (@ashleyaustrew) October 1, 2015
"No, sweetie, don't stab her in the throat. That's not nice." - Motherhood in 11 words— Kim Bongiorno (@LetMeStart) September 29, 2015
7. Spitting out $20 bills. All day long.
Parenthood: where you see your kids as miniature versions of you & they see you as an ATM.— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) September 29, 2015
8. They'll always answer to "candy."
Me: KIDS Kids: Me: I NEED UR HELP Kids: Me: HELLO? Kids: Me: *mutters* for God's sake I just need someone to hand me- Kids: did u say candy— Lurk @ Home Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) September 25, 2015
9. Watch out for this guy.
If I ask you if you want to have kids, it's a trick. The second you say yes I'm going to give you mine and run away.— Goats? (@hazelmotes1) September 26, 2015
10. Or you could just be honest.
Daughter: Daddy, why do I have to go to bed so early? Me: Because we have had enough of you for today— Tim (@Playing_Dad) October 1, 2015
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