SECTIONS
What would you like to know?
Share this Story

Totally accurate depictions of breastfeeding mothers from bra websites

Diane Ashoff has a background in mathematics and a keen eye for baby name trends. She lives with her husband and three children in Florida.

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Ah, breastfeeding memories. I'll never forget how I used to slip into a sexy matching nursing bra and underpants set, nuzzle a stuffed animal and laugh maniacally.

It's not like women (or men, or children or cats) are ever shown in catalogs doing typically human (or feline) activities. Wind machines, odd props and airbrushing do not a realistic photo make. But, you guys? The people styling nursing bra photo shoots are clearly drunk.

Moms no longer want to settle for drab, beige nursing bras, and they absolutely shouldn't have to. Sexy nursing bras are more in style now than ever, so it's no shock that retailers are posing ladies more provocatively. Moms are hot! Moms want to feel sexy. This is not up for debate, nor is it a problem. But that is not what is happening in these photos.

Because what these ladies are, even I can't understand.

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: You Lingerie

Is this not what people usually wear to a baby shower? Grandma? No?

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Linda the Bra Lady

I'm just really enjoying this thing that I am holding that you cannot see me holding but I'm enjoying it and also definitely holding it.

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Lorna Drew

This is my nursing cover. It's not that hard. I never nurse in public without my nursing cover.

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: You Lingerie

I am afraid this is too subtle.

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Her Room

Guys always check to make sure they're still there. "Look, see, the milk's still there."

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Nursing Bra Express

Like this?

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Bravissimo

Yes still there... and really happy to see it.

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Cake Maternity

Guys, help, I think mine are gone!

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Lorna Drew

I refuse to be seen in a frumpy housecoat.

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Figure 8

No it's not hard to hear you at all over all this lactating.

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Lorna Drew

I'm practicing for the best places for the baby to go.

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: You Lingerie

And now it is a Halloween costume.

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Lorna Drew

Do we have to act out that scene from Ghostbusters II for every bath?

Apparently I've been wearing nursing bras all wrong

Image: Linda the Bra Lady

Oh. Is it time to breastfeed her again? I'm happy. I'm happy it's time to breastfeed her again.

More on breastfeeding

Breastfeeding conference tells moms they can't breastfeed
How Google is helping moms breastfeed
Breastfeeding mom says she was told feeding her baby was offensive

Comments
Hot
New in Parenting
Close

And you'll see personalized content just for you whenever you click the My Feed .

SheKnows is making some changes!