Remember that whatever happens in life your kids should always come first until they are adults and can look after themselves. Children need to be nurtured, brought up with love and have a lot of time devoted to them. That’s why having kids is such a big life decision. However, once you have made sure your children are OK and have everything they need, you shouldn’t feel guilty about spending time with your other half. As long as you know the kids are safe and tucked up in bed or being looked after by a relative, there is no reason to worry. Relax, enjoy your couple time and make the most of it.
Every couple should have organised date nights when they know they can devote a whole evening to one another. Even though it may seem a bit premeditated, it will do you both the world of good and help put the spark back into your relationship. It allows you both to be yourself and not "mummy" and "daddy" and remember what attracted you to each other in the first place. It also means you can catch up on each other's day and have a relaxed adult chat without having to worry about the kids needing something or being in earshot when you are whispering sweet nothings into each other's ear.
If you are having problems finding time to see each other or you are worried your partner feels neglected, have a chat with them when the kids have gone to bed. Put household chores and jobs aside and take ten minutes to discuss how you are feeling. It gives you both the chance to air any grievances or simply to check your partner is OK and happy. They may be absolutely fine with the way things are but it will put your mind at rest and also encourages you both to talk and not hold things in.
Many parents shudder at the thought of their kids being invited to a party or a playdate because it can only mean one thing – you have to invite them all back at some stage. However, invitations can be great for you as a parent because it gives you a few hours that you and your partner can spend together. Many parties take place at the weekend so after dropping your child off you can take a walk in the park, go for a bite to eat or simply collapse on the sofa at home until it is time to pick them up again.
There is always an influx of babysitting offers from friends and relatives when you have a baby, but many mums feel awkward taking them up. No one will offer unless they really don’t mind so you should never turn them down. A night off from being parents and a chance to do an adult activity such as go to the cinema, have a nice meal or a romantic night in can do wonders for your relationship and you will be able to relax knowing your child is being looked after.
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