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Terrible Teens: I have a secret crush on my daughter's boyfriend

Ellen Coy is a mom to three teens and wife to a husband of many, many years, but she married young so she still thinks she's pretty hip. She's written a lot of things for a lot of places but she can't tell you where or what. Terrible Tee...

Is it bad that I have a crush on my daughter's boyfriend?

Here's a confession: I have a secret crush on my daughter's boyfriend.

He's the tall, dark and handsome type, exactly what I would have lusted over when I was a sophomore in high school. Problem is, I'm not a sophomore in high school any longer.

My daughter and her boyfriend are ridiculously cute together. He brings her roses and stuffed animals, and they do things that teenagers are supposed to do — they go to the movies or bowling, and they've been to homecoming dances and football games. They make out when they're supposed to be watching Netflix. They wear each other's school sweatshirts. They hold hands and say goofy romantic things to each other. They Snapchat each other, and she shows me the pictures of her beautiful boy and his words across his picture: "I miss you" or "You're so beautiful."

He sends her texts saying, "Listen to the lyrics in this song," and I'm telling you, the lyrics to some of the songs he chooses for her makes me wonder if he goes through thousands of songs to find the absolute perfect song for their particular situation. It's the ultimate romantic gesture.

These are the things a young girl will never forget.

Perhaps I don't have an actual crush on my daughter's boyfriend. Maybe I'm just feeling nostalgia for that first time I fell in love. I'm remembering back to those days when Phil Collins' "In the Air Tonight" played on the cassette, and my own high school boyfriend and I would make out on the basement stairs at a party. Maybe I'm being thrust back down memory lane, thinking about those times my boyfriend would tap on my bedroom window late at night, waking me from a dream about him. I'm thinking about the first time that boyfriend of mine told me he loved me.

I'm thinking that maybe this boy might tell my daughter this soon — that he loves her. It's bittersweet nostalgia to watch as your daughter experiences all of this for the first time.

But, as cute as I think my daughter's boyfriend is, when she storms into her room because they've had a fight over a dumb text or when she rants about how she can't see him because he's got basketball practice or too much homework, I think of my life now. Completely happy with three kids and married for 21 years… And I know I had those experiences she's having, and they were beautiful and wonderful and necessary, but they're just memories, and I love what I have now.

And she will too. Someday, she'll love what she'll have.

More on teens and daughters

5 Reasons being your teen daughter's BFF is a bad idea
Boost your teen girl's self-confidence
5 Tips for raising confident daughters

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