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19 Women Reveal What They Would Have Changed About Their Wedding Day

I'm the Community Editor at SheKnows. My perfect day would be camped in the middle of nowhere, reading an excellent book and writing something true.

#1/21:

The perfect day — almost

Image taken by Mayt/Getty Images
#1/21:

The perfect day — almost

I’ve been married for nine years as of July. I got married in a courthouse and wouldn’t change a thing about it.

Except… maybe I would have hired a real photographer so I would have more than 10 awkwardly angled snapshots of the day. And I definitely would have checked out the menu of the restaurant for our wedding dinner so I didn’t end up eating boring Caesar salad on my wedding day because I was too picky for anything else.

In honor of all the summer weddings we’re sure to attend, we asked our community of women: If you could go back and change anything about your wedding, what would it be?

Here's what they had to say.

Originally published June 2016. Updated June 2017.

#3/21:

The wrong wedding song

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#3/21:

The wrong wedding song

"Ever since I was a kid, I've loved 'Ode to Joy.' All along, I emphasized to the organist at the church that I wanted 'Ode to Joy' as my recessional. She assured me that it would be so. She never actually played it, however. Not even in rehearsal, which prompted me to ask her, yet again, and to emphasize the importance of that particular number.  As the pastor pronounced Larry and I officially man and wife, we turned around to walk down the aisle. I waited to hear the beginning notes of 'Ode to Joy.' Instead, we heard Mendelsohn. As we exited, I felt as though that one woman had completely ruined my wedding." — Tina Hickman

#4/21:

Photos of the wrong guests

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#4/21:

Photos of the wrong guests

"I have four or five pictures of my husband’s boss (which was fine) and a bunch of a friend's drunk date, who we never saw again. When you are only paying for a certain amount of shots, and at the risk of micromanaging, that is something to at least chat about. I had the best photographer and she wouldn't know who to take pictures of, but it is the one thing I wish I would have thought of. Can I tell you one thing I don't regret? Making a rule that our guests were only people my husband and I both knew so I didn't spend my entire wedding introducing my new husband!" — Darlynn Tacinelli

#5/21:

I didn't register

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#5/21:

I didn't register

"Some friends and relatives picked up the slack and bought us towels, pots and pans, but what an oversight that was! For a do-over, I would certainly register! Also, we don't have a picture of the day, not a single one! This was before cell phone cameras, and we were married at a courthouse and everyone forgot to bring a camera. At our reception, three weeks later, I asked a family member to take photos and he took a lot of his girlfriend and some of the baby nieces and nephews, so all were random shots and not many of me and my husband. Professional photographer was needed!" — Haralee Weintraub

#6/21:

I was nauseated

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#6/21:

I was nauseated

"Everything was perfect... except I was throwing up before, during and after wedding. Yep, you guessed it... I had a little bun in the oven. Surprise!!" — Deborah Stallings Stumm

#7/21:

I needed a planner

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#7/21:

I needed a planner

"While my son did an awesome job fixing most of the issues, he still came to me for answers. On the day of your wedding, you should have no woes. Having someone else to fix those woes makes for a wonderful wedding day!" — Jenne Kopalek

#8/21:

A better photographer

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#8/21:

A better photographer

"My photographer took decent photos, but she wasn't experienced with making the best timeline decisions. For example, my wedding was an evening wedding and the outside setting was gorgeous before the ceremony but dark afterward. She could have advised us to do our couple pictures before the ceremony to get the most beautiful shots, but she didn't seem to have that kind of intuition. Pictures are the one part of your wedding that you will carry with you forever, so it's a very important area not to skimp in!" — Jenna

#9/21:

A custom wedding cake

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#9/21:

A custom wedding cake

"I loved everything about my wedding, but if I had the chance to go back, I would look into customizing my wedding cake. I was young, we didn't have Pinterest back then — I didn't know much about options! I went with the cake the caterer gave me." — Meredith Vogel

#10/21:

I wish I'd shifted my focus

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#10/21:

I wish I'd shifted my focus

“I wish we would have focused on the two of us instead of on everyone else.” — Heather Smith

#11/21:

I should have double-checked

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#11/21:

I should have double-checked

"My videographer (my dad's friend) forgot and never showed up. I also had about 40 people that RSVP'd that didn't show up and had a family of 11 that wanted to come and I told them there wasn't enough room. I should have just said yes." — Deborah Dennert

#12/21:

I wish I'd been myself

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#12/21:

I wish I'd been myself

“I would have dressed and accessorized more like myself rather than more like ‘what a traditional bride should look like.’” — Dani Fiori

#13/21:

A professional stylist

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#13/21:

A professional stylist

"Nothing is as lasting as the wedding photos, and I looked cheap. What happened was a friend in beauty school offered to do my hair and makeup as a wedding gift. I was trying to be supportive and was afraid to ask how good she was. Not at all, as it turned out." — Cooper Lawrence

#14/21:

It was too big

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#14/21:

It was too big

"We didn't have a big wedding by any means, just a little over 100 guests, but it was still too many! I hardly got to talk to any one person because I was saying hello to everyone. Not to mention the cost, which just kept going up as more and more 'Yes' responses came in. I wish I would have had more time to spend with those who are really close to me. I didn't even get a photo with my grandparents!" — Sarah Landrum

#15/21:

Trimming my hair day-of

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#15/21:

Trimming my hair day-of

"I had gotten my haircut four weeks before, but my bangs had grown quicker than expected and were slightly in my eyes. In the early pictures it is OK, but once the hairspray dissolved — yikes! I look like Jim Carrey in Dumb and Dumber. Second regret: the puffy sleeves on my dress. I would have preferred a more timeless, classic look rather than a cross between a Disney Princess and an '80's pop star." — Randi Mazzella

#16/21:

Outdoor wedding

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#16/21:

Outdoor wedding

"It was smoldering hot, even AFTER the rainstorm, and the city park was having a demolition derby. The sun caused the lavender icing to turn blue, my hair went flat, and during the prayer I let go of my husband's hand to wipe the sweat off my upper lip. I kid you not." — Stephanie Morrow

#17/21:

I worried too much

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#17/21:

I worried too much

"I was totally stressed (paranoid?) that no one would come. I had nightmares about it, and the thought that our friends and even some family wouldn't show up completely consumed me months before the big event. Looking back now, I realize how amazing our wedding was as one of the last big gatherings of our college crew before the loss of our best friend on Flight 93 on 9/11. It was wasted stress and energy." — Kimmy Bean

#18/21:

I would have had a radical dance

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#18/21:

I would have had a radical dance

"If there's one fool for that man, than I definitely am it! :)" — MostlyMaple

#19/21:

I would have been happier

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#19/21:

I would have been happier

"I did not want to get married in my 20s. However, my parents did not wish to wait any longer. In India, it is a common trend to get the daughters married as soon as they get a good wedding proposal. Therefore, when my mom received an excellent marriage proposal for me, she practically forced me to get married, and I could not deny her. This does not mean that I wasn't annoyed. I was infuriated, to say the least. I performed all the rituals for the sake of it. My mind was somewhere else. Now, after three years of living with my amazing husband, I regret not being happy on the day of my wedding. I wish I had been more involved in the wedding preparations. My wedding dress was a mess, and the venue was not as glorious as I would have wanted it to be." — Ankita Shukla

#20/21:

I would have left earlier

Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows
#20/21:

I would have left earlier

"I was up at 6 a.m. to get my hair done before our 11:00 a.m. ceremony. I was on the go from then until the reception started at 6 p.m. The party was still going strong at 11 p.m., and it was only then that I realized we hadn't figured out a few details about cleaning up after the party. I spent the end of the reception trying to find people to help so my husband and I could get out of there. Our DJ ended up playing 'Hit the road, Jack, and don't you come back no more no more!' to give us a hint to go. By then it was midnight and I was exhausted, and we still had a 45-minute drive to our apartment. Way too late! So I would have planned better and snuck out earlier." — Bonnie Way

#21/21:

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