Marriage is your main priority until a little one enters your life. Then, all you want to do is sleep and take time for yourself. Romance normally falls to the wayside, but it's crucial for your kids to keep your marriage a priority. Here, real couples share how they keep the spark alive — even when they're exhausted!
Ami, mom of three, shares…
Ami has a 14-year old, a 5-year old and a 3-year old, yet maintains an incredible sex life with her husband. Her tricks include:
- On weekends, tiring the kids out during the day to make sure they go to bed early
- Playing jazz music at night in their room instead of turning on the TV
- Opening a bottle of wine or scotch to get the mood going
- Texting each other during the day with stuff related to sex
- Showering together after the kids go to bed
- Every once in a while, scheduling sex
We see why Ami and her husband still have romance in their marriage — they put in the effort daily!
Pamela and her husband had to think outside the box when they had kids at home. When the kids were little, they would put them to bed early or let them watch their favorite television show while she and her husband sat in the dining room with a drink talking and enjoying each other's company. As the kids got older, they would shower together or take a bath together in the evenings. This helped them maintain the closeness and stay connected as a couple even with the kids in the house.
Tips from a man
Men can do their part by: Making sure their wife feels loved and appreciated. By offering a helping hand whenever possible, you're doing your part to keep your marriage a priority and expressing love to your wife.
Roland offers a few tips on things men can do to help keep the romance alive once a baby enters their lives. He advises men to show their wives plenty of appreciation during this challenging time of losing sleep and sacrificing her wants and desires to care for the family. Specific things men can do include:
- Leaving her a note of gratitude and letting her know she is still sexy to you
- Bringing home dinner or offering to make a meal for her
- Taking care of the baby once you get home from work
- Pampering her with a massage
- Bringing her flowers
- Hiring someone to help clean the house
Men and women both agree that scheduling regular date nights is a must when married with babies. It may be easier to just take the kids with you, but then you're focused on the kids as opposed to each other. Other useful tips include:
- Hiring a babysitter regularly
- Hugging and touching each other on a regular basis
- Holding hands in the car and while out in public
- Doing fun things together outside of the house
- Having “maintenance” sex — or having sex even though you may not feel up for it simply to keep the emotional bond and connection going
We want to know — how do you keep the spark alive in your marriage? Share in the comments below!
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