Oh no you didn't!
Almost everyone we know has a hilarious, embarrassing or downright awful sex story up their sleeve. Whether it was a one-night stand gone wrong or a first time in the sack that left something to be desired, we’re taking a look at some of the funniest sex stories we’ve heard in a while. If you have one to add, make sure you leave us a comment!
The pass-out princess
“I was so excited to go on a third date with this guy I really liked and figured this would be the night where we slept together. But I was also really nervous about it since I hadn’t been with a guy since my ex the year before, so I started drinking as soon as we got to the restaurant — and didn’t stop. By the time we got to his place and he was trying to get my bra off, I must have passed out in his bed! He was really sweet about it the next day and even teased me a bit, but my hangover combined with passing out on him really made me feel disgusting. At least I didn’t puke on him.” Meghan, Calgary, Alberta
“I learned the hard way that it’s not always a good thing to be adventurous in bed. My boyfriend and I were just getting warmed up, kissing and stuff and I decided to slide around from being on the bottom to being on top. But mid-slide I thought I would add a bit of what I thought was a sexy high kick. Well, it turned out he lifted his head up just as I was kicking and I ended up breaking his nose. There was blood everywhere and he kind of freaked out. Not a good end to our night.” Sasha, Brooklyn, New York
Allergies ruin everything
“So I decided to buy a new vibrator and introduce it while me and this guy I was dating were in bed. I hadn’t tried it before he came over, but my friend had one and she swore by how amazing it was. But what I didn’t realize is that whatever type of rubber or plastic the thing was made out of caused me to break out in serious hives. Once we started using it, I realized I was really itchy and then all of a sudden I got all these lumps on the inside of my thighs, which kind of killed the mood, not to mention it was super-embarrassing.” Kayla, Park City, Utah
“When I got to his place, I was surprised to find his wife there, ready for the two of us to jump into
bed for a threesome„
Caught — by his parents
"I went home with this guy I met at a bar in college and he took me to what I thought was his house. I was pretty tipsy at this point so I didn’t really pay too much attention to where we were going or what the place looked like. It turned out he lived with his parents and while we were having sex on the couch, they walked in and his mom screamed. I basically fell off the couch, grabbed what clothes I could find and ran out. I never did get my other sock back." Maia, Orlando, Florida
Three’s a crowd
"I once agreed to go home with a guy who I’d seen out a few times and always thought was pretty hot but we never actually dated. We were at a bar with a bunch of other people and he kind of singled me out and bought me a bunch of drinks. Since he seemed so into me, I decided to go with the flow. When I got to his place, I was surprised to find his wife there, ready for the two of us to jump into bed for a threesome. I know this would turn some people on, but I turned right around and left! I haven’t seen the guy since." Courtney, Santa Fe, New Mexico
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