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Guy talk meets girl talk: Communication mistakes you could be making

Jessica Padykula is a freelance writer and editor in Toronto, Canada covering a wide range of  topics for several online lifestyle publications. She is a regular contributor for SheKnows, covering travel, style, relationships, health and...

Communication don'ts

Communicating is easy, right? Not all the time and especially not when it comes to couples. Before you end up facing a communication crisis, make sure you’re steering clear of these communication don’ts.

Woman jumping to conclusions

Not listening

If you and your guy aren’t listening to each other, you’re going to have communication problems. It’s so easy to half-listen while the other person talks (and check your email or send texts mid-conversation), but the less you take in, the harder it is to connect. And if you’re not connecting, you’ll eventually drift apart and start to see some wear and tear on the relationship. Rather than doing three different things while your partner is telling you about his day or what he wants to do next weekend, focus only on him and what he’s saying.

Not making time to talk

No time to talk? We get it -- life gets busy, but if you can manage to have a nightly catch-up (no phones, no TV, no laptop) for 15 to 20 minutes every night, you’ll be more in-tune with each other’s lives. Not knowing what your partner is feeling (Are they stressed? Angry? Upset about something?) could lead to a potential communication crisis. Building in that catch-up time is a great way to make sure you stay on top of any potential relationship issues and work on them before they get out of hand.

Jumping to conclusions

Do you overthink things to the point of getting upset before you even address them with your significant other? If so, you need to find a better way to communicate. Jumping to conclusions before you actually speak with someone to get their thoughts or side of the story can easily cause an argument. When you feel yourself making assumptions, stop, take a deep breath, and go talk to your partner.

Expecting him to read your mind

While it would be great if men had the power to know exactly what we want, when we want it, most of them (or at least the ones we know) don’t. If you want something done, ask. If you don’t like something, be honest about it. If you want to go out for dinner rather than getting takeout (again), voice your opinion. Good communication means saying what’s on your mind, not holding it in and hoping someone guesses what you want.

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