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How to choose your maid of honor

Jessica Padykula is a freelance writer and editor in Toronto, Canada covering a wide range of  topics for several online lifestyle publications. She is a regular contributor for SheKnows, covering travel, style, relationships, health and...

Pick the best BFF for the job

Choosing the person who’s going to stand up there with you and be your rock through the planning process can be tough. She has to be ready to take on some serious responsibility and feel close enough to you to want to make your day perfect. While we’re sure you have lots of options, only one BFF can fill the role. If you’re having some trouble picking the right person, we’re here to help.
Bride and maid of honor

You have history with her

You want your maid of honor to be someone you have a significant amount of history with. We’re not suggesting you scour Facebook until you find your BFF from grade three, but the person that has your back on your big day should be someone who has seen you through a lot of ups and downs. You want this person to really know you and know how you’ve evolved over the years. Ideally she’s someone you went to high school or college with or someone who has earned a place in your heart by being part of your past.

You have a current connection

Having a past connection is one thing, but you don’t want your maid of honor to be someone you haven’t laid eyes on in years. If you regularly talk via phone or Skype that’s fine, but if you have to dust off your phone book to find her number, we suggest you look elsewhere. The key is to find a balance between someone you have a strong past connection with and someone you still see on a fairly regular basis.

She understands you

Everyone has their own set of quirks and trust us when we say yours will likely make an appearance at some point during the wedding planning process. Your maid of honor should be someone who understands you and who knows when to step in and offer suggestions and support – and when to leave you alone. The last thing you want is for the person you’re supposed to be relying on to get upset or frustrated by your behavior. You need someone who really “gets” you and what you need.

She has your back

Your maid of honor is going to be many things – a friend, a confidant, an assistant – but most of all she’s going to be someone you can lean on when you feel overwhelmed. So when you make the choice as to who gets the coveted role, make sure it’s someone you know will have your back and who you can trust to be there for you no matter what.

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