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Bust out of relationship boredom

Jessica Padykula is a freelance writer and editor in Toronto, Canada covering a wide range of  topics for several online lifestyle publications. She is a regular contributor for SheKnows, covering travel, style, relationships, health and...

Have more fun together

The recent Good in Bed survey indicated that 25 percent of respondents reported feeling bored in their relationship, with another 25 percent on the brink of boredom. Interestingly enough, women were the ones that reported being significantly more bored in their relationship than men. With those statistics in mind we thought we’d offer some simple tips for keeping your twosome from teetering over the edge of satisfaction into an angry sea of boredom.

Couple drinking wine and cooking dinner

1Reconnect with friends

If it feels like it's been months or years since you regularly saw your friends, it's time to get back into your social circle. Chances are there was a time in the not too distant past where you and your guy would go out with other people, see movies, have drinks, go to concerts. And while you may be feeling too busy to reconnect, seeing your mutual friends more regularly is a great way to boost the fun factor in your relationship and steer clear of boredom.

2Make staying in more fun

If you're not going out to eat or see friends chances are you're sitting side by side on the couch, staring at the TV or another screen (laptop, iPhone), which may be relaxing but it's also pretty boring. Instead of relying on the mind-numbing power of television to lull you into a post-work stupor, put some effort into making at-home time more interesting for both of you. You can still work in solo, do-nothing time, but in order to bust boredom you're going to have to be proactive.

  • Have a game night. Head to a second hand store and stock up on board games you used to love.
  • Cook together. Instead of one person making the nightly meal or just ordering take out, make dinner time an event by creating a culinary masterpiece together.
  • Build in a cocktail hour. Spend an hour before you start getting dinner ready or once the plates are cleared away, sitting on the patio (weather permitting) to reconnect. Try a new cocktail (or mocktail) every night.

3Develop new date night strategies

Even date night can get boring, so if you're starting to tire of the same old activities it's time to kick things up a few notches. Here's what we suggest:

  1. Take some time to write down several activities you each want to try or places you want to go.
  2. Cut each date idea out so you have at least 12 to 15 separate ideas. If you're feeling really ambitious, create categories such as sports, culture, dining, romantic, etc.
  3. Place your date ideas into a jar or small box.
  4. Next time date night rolls around, reach into the box or jar, pull something out and have fun!

4Try monthly mystery dates

We love the idea of taking turns planning out mystery dates for each other. This can be once a month (or more or less, depending on how much you take to the idea) and it's a great way to really spice up your routine and nip any lurking boredom in the bud. Whoever's turn it is will plan out a fun day or evening for the two of you to enjoy that goes above and beyond making dinner reservations. Dinner (or another meal out) may be involved, but the point is to get creative. Work in trips to local attractions, seasonal activities, visit art or museum exhibits, just-opened bars and cafes, and anything else that will help make the day feel special.

5Make fun a priority

If you really want to put an end to boredom, you have to put some effort into it, which means making fun a priority. Just like you make time to eat, work out, have sex, do the laundry – you need to build in time for having fun. Even on days where you feel too lazy to go anywhere or do anything, put aside your desire to hit the couch and do something you'll both enjoy. You can stare at the TV when you get home!

More relationship advice

De-clutter your relationship
6 Simple ways to keep a guy interested
Improve your marriage in 5 easy steps

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