We consulted Dr Terri Orbuch, author of the book 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage From Good to Great (Random House), and she provided these tips for spicing up your sex life.
Talking about sex can be physiologically arousing to both partners. You can discuss what makes your sex life exciting, your sexual fantasies or what each of you might desire from your partner.
It doesn't have to be dramatic. Some ideas: play a romantic board game for couples. Pick up bottles of scented massage oils. Buy a sex toy. Change the place or situation for your lovemaking. Wear a new or different article of clothing that your partner would love to see you in.
Sexual fantasies can be a healthy and natural part of a relationship. Some couples merely share their sexual fantasies through conversation, but do not explore them physically with each other. Just make sure the sexual fantasy or behavior doesn't lead to emotional or physical discomfort for either partner, conflict in the relationship or problems in other areas of your life.
Sex expert Lucille Graham also offers these tips to give your sex life a jumpstart.
Most men love adult videos, while many women do not -- or at least they think they don't. You can ease your way into pornography by watching sex videos that are instructional. These videos are normally narrated by a sex therapist or doctor and can teach you things, such as how to stimulate someone or give oral sex. Once you get comfortable enough to watch this type of film with your partner, you can start to explore porn movies. Pick a movie that you find appealing or that features one of your hidden sexual fantasies.
Designate one night a week where your partner is in total control in the bedroom. You must submit to everything he says or does (within healthy limits, of course). You may find that you like the role of the submissive.
Spice up your sex life by breaking from your regular routine. If you always have sex at bedtime, try having it in the morning right after you wake up instead. If it's generally missionary position, night after night, take the lead and hop on top.
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