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How to rev up your sex life

Kori Ellis is an editor and writer based in San Antonio, TX, where she lives with her husband and four children. At SheKnows, she writes about parenting, fashion, beauty and other lifestyle topics. Additionally, Kori has been published i...

Turn up the heat in the bedroom

Add some excitement to your sex life and connect with your partner by being open-minded and honest about what you want in the bedroom. Whether married for years or only dating for a few months, everyone can use a few sex tips now and then to keep things interesting. We talked to Dr Eric Braverman, author of Younger (Sexier) You, and he offered these tips to rev up your sex life.

Couple having sex

1Keep your clothes on

Indulge in fully clothed foreplay, teasing and stroking your bodies through fabric. You're building up the anticipation, so when you finally do have skin-on-skin contact, it'll be that much more explosive and exciting.

2Learn the art of erotic touch

You'll need some oil and a well-heated room. Warm the oil in the palms of your hands and experiment with your partner to learn where he or she likes to be massaged.

3Create the mood

Aromatherapy, music, soft lighting, candles, even different textures and revealing clothing really do alter your brain chemistry by triggering your senses. If you surround yourself with calm and peace for at least a portion of every day, you'll accelerate the restoration of your acetylcholine.

4Try Allura or Zestra

These non-prescription topical treatments are used by many women to improve sexual arousal. They can be applied to the clitoris, labia and vaginal opening during foreplay to increase both the speed of nerve conduction and the blood flow to the genitals. It takes about three to five minutes of application and gentle massage, and its affect can last as long as 45 minutes.

5Do some yoga

Yoga breathing before lovemaking can increase arousal. There's no simpler way to oxygenate the blood, a process that increases sexual energy and elevates desire. Take rapid, rhythmic, and shallow breaths through the nose. Keep your mouth closed. Breathe this way for one to three minutes.

6Keep things exciting

Rev up your sex life with these additional tips and tricks:

  • Try a new sex position every week
  • Only have sex with the lights on
  • Lie in bed naked together and just kiss
  • Experiment with a sex toy and a bottle of lube
  • Act out one of your sexual fantasies with your partner
  • Concentrate on the foreplay rather than intercourse
  • Talk to your partner in bed about what you want him/her to do to you
If you are in a sexual rut and can't seem to get out of it, don't be afraid to seek help. Talk to a psychologist or sex therapist separately and/or as a couple to learn more about what you want and need in the bedroom. Though sex isn't the end-all in every relationship, an active sex life is certainly healthy and a whole lot of fun.

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