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How to increase the intimacy in your relationship

Jessica Padykula is a freelance writer and editor in Toronto, Canada covering a wide range of  topics for several online lifestyle publications. She is a regular contributor for SheKnows, covering travel, style, relationships, health and...

Get a little closer

Have you lost that loving feeling? Can you remember the last time you gave your guy a hug? It might be time for an intimacy tune-up for your twosome. Read on for some simple ways to increase the closeness in your relationship.

Couple hugging

1Make time To talk about the relationship


When was the last time you sat down and seriously talked about how you feel about your relationship? If it's been a while, set aside an evening -- ideally a weekend so you're not frazzled and stressed about work -- and discuss what's great and not so great. Things might come up that you don't want to hear, but any time spent talking openly and honestly about your twosome is time well spent and can only strengthen your bond.

Also read about how to celebrate your relationship >>

2Give each other some space

This may seem counterproductive, but giving each other space can make room for intimacy. Whether it's once a week or once a month, do something solo. Hit the gym or go out for dinner with a friend while he stays home and vice versa. When you do see each other, you should be refreshed and more inclined to intimacy.

Check out how to deal with marriage humps >>

3Don't discount hugs, cuddles & kisses

Small signs of affection are the cornerstones of intimacy. Putting some effort into hugging, kissing, touching and cuddling can do wonders to boost your mood and his. Yes, sex is great (and we're getting to that), but little love gestures are important for boosting your bond and feeling connected.

4Have slowed-down sex

Rather than a quickie or your usual rushed romp, try and slow things down. Spend time looking into each other's eyes, softly touching and enjoying extended foreplay. This kind of attention to detail during sex can make things more satisfying for both of you and create some serious intimacy.

Make sure to read: Secrets for maintaining a successful marriage >>

A few more ways to increase intimacy

  • Date night: Schedule one date night each month so you can reconnect and talk without everyday distractions.
  • Weekend away: If you can swing it, plan a weekend getaway. Try a cottage retreat, go camping, head to the spa together or cozy up at a bed and breakfast.
  • Try something new: Doing something fun that neither of you have tried is a great way to boost your bond. Take a cooking class, try a new sport or learn a language together.
  • Focus on each other: Limit distractions when you are in the same room talking to each other. This means no laptops, no texting while talking and no watching TV when the other person wants to have a discussion.

More relationship tips

5 Tips to heat up your relationship
3 Unhealthy relationship habits to curb
4 Steps to better communication

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