Raincheck For Sex

It happens to all of us. Sometimes we're just not in the mood for sex. So what's a girl to do? Here's how to take a raincheck for sex.

Not in the mood for sex?

It's late. You're nicely snuggled under the quilt, drifting pleasantly off to sleep. Your sweetheart nuzzles the side of your neck and you snuggle deeper into the bed. He says "Ah come on, just a quickie."

Your response is:

  1. "Oh, I'd love to!" and join him for a round of enthusiastic sex.
  2. You roll your eyes, thinking "again?!" and join him for a round of unenthusiastic sex.
  3. Groan. Sigh: "Not tonight, I'm tired." You move away from him and go to sleep.

If your response is #1, you belong in the Playboy Hall of Fame and your mate should worship you daily.

If your response is #2 or #3, enough repeats of this scenario and your significant other may sniff outside his territory.

I know, I know, you shouldn't have to have sex when you're not in the mood. Agreed! And that's what rainchecks were invented for -- or when you can't or just don't wanna.

If your usual response is "OK, whatever, I guess I have to" with the ensuing lackluster duty-sex, he feels your lack of passion. He's horny, not dumb. You're better off giving him a raincheck for when you are willing to fully engage.

If your usual response is to groan, sigh, and "not-tonight" him, give him a raincheck so he knows he's not being personally rejected, just that his offer of tonight's nookie is being declined.

How to give a raincheck for sex

How do you give a raincheck? You do it with sweet promise:

"Honey, I would love to make love with you, only tonight, I can't do it justice. I want to be fully there for you when we do, cause it's so great when we're both turned on, so how about a raincheck for tomorrow/this weekend/?"

But beware -- a raincheck is only valuable if it's redeemed. You can't welch on a raincheck, that's not playing fair.

Now if you offer the redemption before it's even called on, why then you get bonus points, and that can lead to a lot more fun!

In the mean time, make sure your guy feels loved, appreciated and not rejected.
Check out these 5 ways to make your man feel special >>


More ideas for getting in the mood

3 No-fail ways to get in the mood for sex
Find the source: Why aren't you in the mood?
How to revive your sex drive

Tags: husband and wife

Recommended for you


Comments on "What to do when you're not in the mood for sex"

Jhonny July 11, 2012 | 12:14 PM

LOL!! I was being sarcastic, I don't plan my life that far ahead of time, and I never make lists, in atuialtcy, when an idea hits me I drop everthing and get it done (which is not always the practical thing to do) because I know tomorrow I'll be distracted by a different idea. I really don't need to make resolutions, I don't spend much time debating wheteher I should do something or not, if I feel passionate enough about something, it WILL get done, whatever the cost. There's nothing for me to quit because I'm not addicted to anything, whenever I notice in myself a pattern of behavior (good or bad) taking shape I stop abruptly and change course on the fly, not because I have a strong will but because I have a very short attention span. I have always felt that having a particular fetish and being addicted to any one drug or thing or whatever, is for the masses, of course, things are not that black & white and people have justifications and reasons for everything but I believe an artist should not be bound by addiction, it's too restrictive and boring, ultimately it all depends on the individual mindset but personally, I'd rather be free to explore and express everything, my life and my behavior are not much different than my artwork, the only exception being the commitment I have for my kids.I didn't say "have more with other people", you can always have with yourself, where's the harm in that? (besides hairy palms) I've been married to the same woman for 23 years and I have 2 kids, so I'm positive it will never happen, to have with strangers doesn't appeal to me in the least, I have to care for the person I'm with, otherwise it doesn't do anything for me, I tried going to a prostitute once when I was younger, that was a disaster. ual frustration is a very important part of my life, it fuels my anger and drive, is the engine that makes everything artistic possible, all that truncated passion and energy gets put to a good use: ART. Don't feel bad for me, I like it that way :)

+ Add Comment

(required - not published)