Meet Your Match

It's not always easy to find someone who is right for you, but your dry spell could be more than just bad luck. If you've been circling the waters for some time with nothing to show for your search, here are some reasons you might be coming up short.

Sad woman.

You're too needy

Acting too serious too soon can scare some guys off. Even if you think you've made a connection and you really like someone you've been seeing, don't act too clingy after just a few dates. Give your new guy some breathing room so he doesn't go running scared before date number four.

You're too picky

Sure, standards are good. You can't go dating every beer-swilling, unemployed loser than comes knocking, but just because he doesn't make six figures and have abs of steel doesn't mean you shouldn't give him a chance. If you're not finding Mr. Right, you may need to readjust your idea of who that really is.

How to readjust:

  • Date outside your comfort zone. Say yes to guys who you aren't normally attracted to just to see what happens.
  • Ask friends to set you up or introduce you to nice, single guys they know. You may not make a love connection, but you will meet men you might not usually go for.
  • Rethink your must-have traits. Maybe your view of Mr. Right is too narrow. Does he have to be a doctor with blonde hair? Broaden your scope of what boyfriend material means.

You don't go out enough

In order to meet guys, you have to leave the house. This means trying new classes at the gym, going to parties with friends, volunteering and even signing up for local sports teams as a way to meet people with similar interests – ideally cute ones, with nice eyes and killer smile. Quick tip: Adopt the "just say yes" policy for one month. During that time say yes to everyone - friends who want to go dancing, the guy from your gym who wants to grab coffee, your sister who wants to go on a last-minute weekend road trip. You never know what will happen when you say yes!

You're not confident

If you don't project confidence when in the presence of men you might be interested in, you can probably write off a love connection. Getting asked out (or asking someone out and getting a yes) requires a certain level of confidence. And just because you don't feel confident doesn't mean you can't act like you are.

Tips to appear more confident:

  • Smile more and make eye contact. Looking down makes you look nervous.
  • Ask questions. Asking thoughtful questions about his life will take the pressure off of you to come up with entertaining anecdotes and give you more time to collect your thoughts.
  • Relax and don't fidget. Constantly playing with your hair, clothes or drink is a dead giveaway you're nervous. Do you best to keep your hands to yourself and stay calm.

More dating advice

4 Signs he might not be the one
5 First date red flags
3 Ways to compromise

Tags: coping with being single

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