Maybe you were lucky to have never learned these things; maybe you learned them but were lucky enough to have overcome them.
Read the list for recognizing over-responsibility below and see if any of them fit. If not, consider yourself exceedingly fortunate; you have avoided female gender traps that have been passed down through the centuries. (Yes, I know: Men have their gender traps, too.)
If you say yes to any on the list, you need to take stock. Do you want to keep doing them? Chances are, they've become so much a habit -- so much a part of who you are -- you don't even notice when taking more responsibility than necessary.
If you choose to make changes and give up being too good for your own good, be aware how that will affect others; your change will require them to make changes, too -- changes they may not want. For example, not picking up your teenager's clothes will require a shift for your child. She will have to do it herself; in fact, she may well try to navigate you back to doing it for her. The same will be true for things you do for your husband/partner, people at work, even your friends and parents.
Take Gloria's example: Upon returning from a recent women's retreat where she worked on this very issue, she exclaimed, "What a relief! I have so much more energy. It was tough at first, though. I kept thinking it would just be easier to do things for others than to put up with their fussing, their bad moods or just waiting. But I'm so glad I stuck it out. Our family life runs much smoother now, at least for me. I'm smiling so much more."
What is the cost of your keeping the peace? What do you lose by being too good for your own good?
It's great being a woman, but we need to remove the "trainings" that are not in our best interest.
And you'll see personalized content just for you whenever you click the My Feed .
SheKnows is making some changes!