Why Men Cheat On Successful Women
Jesse James isn't exactly Sandra Bullock material. Most of us knew that, even before inked-up stripper Michelle 'Bombshell McGee' started gushing about her 11-month affair with the 'Vanilla Gorilla.' But that begs the question: Why would he trade beautiful, rich, sweet, talented Sandra for trashy, tatted, Nazi-loving (and let's face it) fugly Michelle? More importantly, why do men cheat on successful women? Here, our guest columnist, Dr. Dennis Lin, a sex therapist and psychiatrist at Beth Israel Medical Center in Manhattan, gives us the deets.
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So how do you spot a cheater?
For the majority of women who are not actresses or Oscar winners but who are concerned that their men may be cheating on them, how do you spot a cheater? Here are five signs for to be on the lookout for:
1. HE RECENTLY LOST HIS JOB.
Unemployment puts strain on a marriage and can make a man feel vulnerable, especially if the job was important to him and defined his identity. When a man doesn't feel so good about himself, he may boost his self-esteem through an affair.
2. HE IS SPENDING LESS TIME WITH YOU.
You're watching TV; he's on the computer. You go to bed; he stays up late. You're in the same house but not really together. If a man is organizing his life to spend less time with you, it doesn't really matter whether he has met someone. Such behavior signals a distance that becomes a breeding ground for infidelity.
3. HE IS BEING LESS AFFECTIONATE.
Perhaps he doesn't cuddle with you in bed anymore. Or he comes to bed fully dressed when he once slept nude. These are all ways of disconnecting and may indicate he is getting his intimacy somewhere else.
4. HIS COMPUTER HABITS HAVE CHANGED.
Check his computer's browser history once in a while to see where he's been. A new and secretive email account would be a red flag. A new email account doesn't necessarily mean your significant other is having an affair; but it becomes more likely if he is not willing to share the content of the account with you.
5. HIS CELL PHONE HABITS HAVE CHANGED.
Lastly, beware of new cell phone habits. For example, he suddenly gets a new phone with a password lock. Or perhaps now he keeps his cell phone in his pocket when in the past he would leave it on the counter. Or maybe he used to make calls and send texts while you were around, but now excuses himself each time the phone rings.
For more tips on spotting a cheater: