Sweet As Sugar

The 20-something dating pool might have an abundance of tanned, toned, fist-pumping man candy. But if you really want a taste of the sweet life, consider finding yourself a sugar daddy. After all, men tend to grow up slower than women, right? So your salt-n-peppa papa should be right on par with your level of maturity -- plus, he can afford a trip to St. Barts! Here, our writer gives you five reasons why you should have a sugar daddy.

When I was a wee, nubile 23-year-old writer living in the big bad, very expensive city of Manhattan where rent is the equivalent of a vacation to a tropical paradise and I subsisted on Ramen noodles for two out of my three daily meals, I definitely made a conscious decision to date guys that had stability, a.k.a. a good job.

Of course, most of the 23-year-old guys I knew were like me --struggling and unsure of their career path. In fact, most could often be found on a weekend playing touch football or, let's face it, getting high, rather than looking at the help wanted ads. But I guess that's what our 20s are meant to be -- a time of self-exploration, dipping our pinky toes into different career fields, drinking martinis on weeknights and engaging in casual relationships with Mr. Right Now.

By 22, after having attended college in Manhattan and having done the "dating thing" since the ripe old age of 18, I was very much channeling Charlotte from Sex in the City, sitting in a coffee shop with my girlfriends, lamenting the whereabouts of my Mr. Right. And having always had a bit of a daddy complex, dating a guy 10 years older than me didn't feel strange. In fact, it was quite liberating to kick to the curb those directionless 20-something men, whose idea of a date was going Dutch at the local bar, where their roving eyes would be forever scanning the room to see if someone better was about to walk by.

So I dated half a dozen guys who were all 10 to 15 years older than me (I drew the line at 17 years -- for some reason, anything over 20 began to feel a little too familial for me), before I found "the one" and I finally felt like I was on the right track to finding love.

I know what you're thinking -- how could I give up the ripped hard-bodies, nowhere near bald-heads and the shared generational inside jokes for an older guy who would essentially possess none of those traits?

Well here's why, dating and eventually marrying a sugar daddy truly does rock, and supersedes any of the drawbacks one might think go along with the sugar daddy package.


1. Youth

He will always be older than you. There's nothing wrong with having a little leverage when it comes to your relationships -- youth will always be on your side. At least you'll never have to worry about him leaving you for a younger woman... unless he's interested in dating a fetus.

2. Financial security

I know it doesn't sound very sexy, but when the gas company turns off your heat in the dead of winter and your credit card is declined just as you've unloaded a week's worth of groceries, those washboard abs will be the last thing you're thinking about.

3. Wisdom

Having a solid 10 to 15 years more experience of living on this planet than you do, he might be able to school you on a few historical facts (ones that happened way before you were even born) that will always supply you with great conversational tidbits at cocktail parties.

4. Experience

Although he may be a little set in his ways, those "ways" are steeped in years of experience, and he has truly done the test-driving for you. He can teach you the best way to uncork a bottle of wine, he'll always remember to rotate the tires on your car and will have your anniversary date burned into his brain (having perhaps forgotten to do so with his previous relationship and having suffered the inevitable consequences).

5. Devotion

Feeling so incredibly lucky to have snagged a pretty young thing like you, and because he's waited so long to find his one true love, he will (for the most part) devote himself to you.

Now, I'm not recommending you find yourself a 90-year-old billionaire a la Anna Nicole Smith. But next time you find yourself pining over the young and the restless, take it from me: Having a sugar daddy sure is sweet.

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Comments on "5 Reasons you should have a sugar daddy"

Sugars June 22, 2013 | 1:24 AM

This entire thing about the SD business is pretty inaccurate. An SD relationship is never meant to turn into marriage, and the way this article is written makes it seem like an SD is your boyfriend. And no, just because your boyfriend is rich and older than you does not mean he is your sugardaddy. Dating someone older than you doesn't make you a sugarbaby. This industry doesn't work like that. This article is wrong, and the comments are wrong as well. Being a sugarbaby does not mean you have to sleep with the person. It is not prostitution. It is not because we have daddy issues or lack self-respect. Do your research before you make your comments.

Hadanssah May 27, 2013 | 10:47 AM

I love dis article.I am 19 frm Nigeria,i started dating older men frm d age of 17,i was so young n naive i was disvirgined by d first older man den i met d other one which am still dating.the second one showed me love,care n support.He encourages me in ma skul works n he also fought n tried so hard for me to gain admission into one of d best universities here in Nigeria.We did nt ave for a year bt he was alwaz there for me,he lives in another state wich is about 17hrs drive bt we talk everday lik 6 times in a day.He has showed me love n care like a husband does nt as a boyfriend or a sugardaddy.I knw am lucky n if he propose marriage i will accept it.Girls all over d world dnt think sugar daddy is all about prostituting,if u can ave wit a man who is young who buys u gifts n gives u money wat is diff wit aving a relationship wit d older man? Dat mean u also re prostituting,think abt it n dnt judge from d outside

Sugar Daddy September 06, 2012 | 4:42 PM

Have fun being his nurse as he ages.

Bobbi April 20, 2012 | 4:00 PM

I love it! I can't stand guys in their 20s. Even into their mid 30s sometimes it's like dating a high school boy. They are so insecure and obsessed with having all the power in a relationship, and they think they just deserve everything you give them. Older men have usually mellowed out and realized that a relationship is about making each other happy, not being in control. I think it's much more superficial to say you wouldn't date an older man because his body isn't as hot as a 25 year old, and he doesn't have thick hair.

Julia February 17, 2012 | 11:47 PM

Dont expect it to last. My sister did this and every 3 months she had to find another cus they would drop her fast. Most werent rich but just doctors and lawyers spending their pocket money so their wives dont find out. She got pregnant from one and he convinced her into an abortion. She stopped cold turkey. She isnt very happy or during all this either. It wasnt even worth it since she splurged the money anyway. He got what he wanted with no consequences and is still up to it. She is still freezing up at evey baby carriage. She didnt listen to my advice...she got what she deserved for being lazy and greedy. These men are not very nice, very rich or into getting married or settling down. You need to be real smart to do this. Dont believe all his lies that his wife is cold etc. And no matter how much you try to lie to yourself its prostitution plain and simple. The money and cheap gifts isnt worth the damage to your self esteem and the rough . Its all about power and he still has the uppr hand. Be careful with these types of men. They see the world as ther playground you you are a f**k toy.

Idstar April 27, 2011 | 10:44 AM

Lol. I‘ll be giving this a thought when next am 23 years old.

Samantha August 27, 2010 | 1:54 PM

I LOVE this article! I am 28 and in the middle of a divorce and I just started noticing different types of guys that I never noticed when I was younger. I guess you can say I am a little more wordly and cultured b/c of life's experiences and dating an older man is just what I have recently been thinking a lot about. And mostly for the same reasons listed. And as for that one person who said the author is lazy...that's from a close-minded person. I have a career and intend to always have the career that I worked so hard for. I have a degree related to my job field and plan on going to college for my Master's soon. It's not about that. I just like the idea of having someone on my level and let's face it, a lot of us suffer from daddy issues. I like someone who will protect me and be more successful than me. Someone I can look up to. I have a great step-dad, my bio father abandoned me and my sis which is probably where the issues came from. I also like older men because they are more mature, they like doing things that I am into. Younger guys tend to take women for granted and would rather watch football and belch all day than take their woman to a five-star restaurant. I'll pass. My soon-to-be ex husband is the younger guy that I am trying to get away from. I feel like I am growing at warp speed and he's standing still. He's 2 years older than me but still acts like a child. I need a man and older men usually fit the bill. I'm definitely looking for my SUGAR DADDY! lol. It's just a preference. Everyone has them...preferences, I mean. So why belittle someone for liking older men? Try thinking OUTSIDE of the box...the World is your oyster and you don't know what you might find. As long as you're happy. :)

Louise May 31, 2010 | 5:11 PM

I've just started looking into the whole 'sugardaddy' idea, and I have a few questions. Is it classed as obligatory that you 'repay' them with ual favours or is this guy trying to get me to prostitute myself to him???Is the whole idea that you entertain them whilst they help you with clothes/money etc??I'm not fully sure if I would want to sleep with a man, just for luxuries-therefore does that show this is not for me? Thanks

Beth April 25, 2010 | 9:16 PM

I'm sorry but that's not my cup of tea. I don't want to sleep with a guy that is that much older (sag and drag). Sounds to me like your too lazy and motivated to make your own way. Maybe, you lack some self-respect, too. You pay a price to be "arm candy" and there is a lot to be said for learning through living. This sounds superficial and a little like "pimping yourself". Usually, men go for the much younger women because they are shallow and have a hard time "holding their own" with a woman their own age. That is just gross!

martyne March 12, 2010 | 4:57 PM

hysterical. You are right on track! Love the idea of paying the gas company and not worrying about whether or not he's got a six pack under his shirt!

GAK March 09, 2010 | 4:40 PM

Been there and done that....I would have been called a "mistress", I believe. Got me through college....free. Nice clothes, all the money I needed plus an older guy that worshiped the ground I walked on. I also got to travel all over Europe plus many places in the U.S. Just don't expect marriage out of them, though. That's not part of the deal.

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