10 Lies men tell

Bust These Myths

There's no denying it, guy's lie. They tell us things like, "I'm five minutes away" when they haven't left yet or when they had to go to that strip club, all they could think of was us. Mostly they lie to keep themselves out of trouble or to spare our feelings.

Shady looking man in front of woman

Truth be told, some of the fiction floating off their tongues can be quite convincing especially when we want to believe it. Here, we've got the insider's guyde to what he really means when he delivers his Oscar winning lies... er, lines.

"I'll call you."

What he really means: I might call you.

A guy will almost always say this upon any departing situation as a matter of protocol. If he isn't going to call, he doesn't want to hurt your feelings by saying so. Don't wait by the phone – live your life. If the call doesn't come in a few days, it's not coming.

"I don't want to have sex with you, I just want to lie here with you."

What he really means: I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to have sex with you, but I'll lie here if it means there's a chance it might lead to sex.

One of a guy's goals in life is to get laid, and he will say whatever he needs to, to increase his odds. For some, that means a passive-aggressive approach – his objective being to put you at ease. Watch out, this guy will pounce as soon as your red-light turns yellow.

"I won't show the tape to anyone."

What he really means: I won't show it to everyone, just my best friends.

If he doesn't promise to hide the proposed X-rated treasure, the odds of you consenting to co-star in it are slim to none. But making a sex tape is a major accomplishment for a guy and while sure it is a good time to review his moves alone, it's even better to show it off high-fiving with his homies.

"That was the best sex I've ever had."

What he really means: That was good sex.

Unless it was his first time or your guy has some freakish cataloging memory capability, a man simply can't recall the details of all the sex he's had. He may be saying this in hopes you return the sentiment, but unless you are feeling generous, withhold your heavyweight compliments for when you really mean it.

"I love you."

What he really means: It loves you and I like you.

Typically said in response to a woman who has professed her love. The guy loves being with her sexually and their emotional connection is strong too, therefore he feels forced to return the sentiment out of fear of losing her.

"I'm not married."

What he really means: I'm not committed to my wife.

Cheating and lying go together like girls and lip gloss. And plenty of committed-on-paper men are looking for a bachelor life on the side... if they can get away with it. It is hard for guys to lie well though about the dutiful wife waiting for them at home, so if your gut thinks he might be married, follow it.

"It's not you, it's me."

What he really means: It's totally you, I just can't tell you that.

A guy's worst nightmare is breaking up with a girl and seeing her cry (hence the text breakup), so he will say anything to avoid waterworks. Another variation of this is "you're too good for me" or "I'm going through some things right now."

"I've never told anyone this before."

What he really means: I've never told you this before.

It is not uncommon for a guy to have a scripted confession that he divulges to all of his ladies which instantly makes her heart melt for him. The disclosure of an admission makes her feel like a chosen one, and instantly she becomes putty in his palm.

"I love your parents."

What he really means: You love your parents and I will deal with them

A smart guy knows that a girl who is close to mom and dad will think twice about him if he doesn't get along with her family, and that starts with approval from the top. For a Daddy's girl/girl who is besties with her mom, an ultimate compliment paid, will be that of how great her parents are.

"No, I never dated her."

What he really means: I hooked up with her, I just can't tell you because you will freak out.

This is a classic case of 'we can't handle the truth.' He is lying to prevent an inevitable line of follow-up questions that will result in more decisions to lie or to tell the truth (i.e. Was she better in bed? Do you think she is prettier? Do you still have feelings for her?). This is a public fight waiting to happen.


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Comments on "10 Lies men tell"

Me January 03, 2011 | 8:33 AM

Load of tin-foil hat rubbish.

Kimzie September 28, 2010 | 4:21 PM

Oh man..will i ever lose my virginity....u r makin me not trust him...

Belly jelly September 05, 2010 | 3:07 PM

Not all men lie

Sobiya August 30, 2010 | 9:37 AM

Geez... i dont trust this, i know my man very well.. he is all honest and true to me

A Woman August 14, 2010 | 6:16 PM

I tend to agree w/ the men!! All men are not scum, some can be very sweet!!

irish August 06, 2010 | 7:57 AM

dis is reali upsetting nd to tink ive heard almost al of dese lies

Lydia August 05, 2010 | 8:20 AM

Indeed men will always be men and they will always hide the truth away from their partners.They will always be like rubber bands,"spring back and then, close".

Lydia August 05, 2010 | 8:13 AM

These are exactly lies of men.They never tell the truth.

ronnie July 26, 2010 | 4:02 AM

i think women are just as guilty as men are

Another Man July 08, 2010 | 9:31 PM

This is a load of bullcrap. And biased. This covers maybe 50% of men. Don't base all guys off of just the retards you have dated.

Tiff June 08, 2010 | 12:34 PM

Definitely been through these before. The last one is hilarious! I just wish men knew how to step up to the plate with lasting truth & care.

yet another man April 22, 2010 | 8:20 PM

How biased can this list get? Not all men are emotionless and entirely -driven as this writer perceives them to be.

Soulja April 22, 2010 | 5:24 AM

Bull, women lie just as much if not more. Please stop this madness. How about girls who do not know what their real emotions are? They think they love you but it is just lust. After they say they want to marry you and have your children then weeks later they have a new boyfriend after saying they are too busy for a relationship

Jeremiah February 22, 2010 | 11:45 AM

This is not cool. Yes i'd say 90% of guys are strait up dirt bags but what about the other 10%... Just know ladies that you have to be careful finding the right guy...

valerie February 17, 2010 | 7:40 AM

well you guys got it all right just like mine also it is the same . he does it also..He lies so much and i eventually catch him what a pity

Another man... February 15, 2010 | 7:26 PM

What is wrong with you all? I agree with Ashley. Do you listen to yourselves? "Men should think it's too late to apologize." Wow... You wouldn't hear me say that all women are over-complicated, over-emotional, ist, feminists. Because they're not. Just 2/4 of the female commenters on here. I happen to be very in touch with my emotions and when I say "I love you" I mean it. Sounds like the author of this just got over a bad relationship and got turned off of all guys...

Cara January 27, 2010 | 10:53 AM

I don't think the writer is saying all guys lie all the time. I think she is just saying that sometimes these are the lies guys tell because let's be honest - they do! I think Summer makes a good point - a lot of times guys don't understand their emotions or they are sometimes to afraid to deal with the truth which is sad because it causes them and us so much more pain. I actually read this writer's book about dating and she is definitely not anti-guy.

Ashley December 12, 2009 | 2:22 AM

Damn, this is so depressing. I agree, terribly cynical. I mean really? What happened to you to make you think that males were inherently soulless? Good honest men that mean it when they say they like your parents or that they love you exist. Suprise!

Summer Sage November 13, 2009 | 2:07 PM

It may not be the way men want it to be or intend for it to be, but it's so true.If they would take time to understand the true emotions, feelings of a woman then maybe, just maybe they could be more understanding & truthful. Love to see all men have to live for 1 month in a womans body, soul, mind then maybe they would be less of a liar. Men should think before it's to late to apologize.

a man November 07, 2009 | 6:02 PM

wow. you people are cynical as hell.

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