Improve Your Relationship

Don't let work, kids, your girlfriends or your crazy schedule get in the way of your relationship. It's time to get out of your routine and spice things up, and SheKnows knows just what will do the trick!

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How to Reignite the passion

"Doing something out of the ordinary will spark the relationship," says Dr. Taffy Wagner, a love and money expert and author of Debt Dilemma. She recommends that in order to reignite passion in a relationship that has gone routine:

  • Have a date night at the other person's favorite place
  • Dinner theater is always a nice twist
  • Treat your mate to a vacation where you pay for everything
  • Send your mate a dozen balloons
  • Even a one night stay over at a hotel that has hot-tubs in the room to break up the routine.

Terri Orbuch, PhD, better known as television and radio's Love Doctor, who specializes in marriage, modern dating, love, and sex, offers the following tips:

Add a new or exciting element into your life.
When your marital sex life is in the doldrums, an effective remedy is get you and your partner excited--out of bed. This could be anything from skiing to taking a cooking class to going on a mystery date. It transmits the subliminal message of freshness, energy, and unpredictability -- just what you want in the sack.

Be afraid -- be very afraid.
Plan an activity that scares the living daylights out of you and your partner. Go on a roller coaster ride or see a scary movie. Studies show that activities producing fear and excitement produce hormones associated with sexual arousal.

Practice small endearments.
Make an effort to kiss him when you see him. Hold hands when you go out. Snuggle while you watch TV. Studies show that people feel more connected to their partners when they hold hands, hug, kiss, and cuddle. This closeness leads to more and better sex.

Surprise him with an erotic email.
Send your partner a sexy email or give him a call out of the blue in the middle of the day. Showing your guy that you're hot for him, even during your busy day, is very exciting to males.

Reacquaint yourselves.
When was the last time you two talked about something other than work and family? Ask him about his dreams. Ask him to tell you about his favorite pre-marriage vacation. Get to know him again just like you did on your first dates. It will work wonders on your love life.

Get a tune-up.
There's nothing wrong with relationship workshops. In fact, there are so many fun ones these days that you and your guy might just want to make it an annual event. The whole point of these events is to get two people loving again. Take a tip or two from pros -- that's what they're good at. You change your oil every 5,000 miles, don't you? Why not put a little effort into your sex life and relationship.

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Comments on "How to keep the romance alive (and hot!)"

Katie January 18, 2013 | 1:02 PM

Thanks for this. I definitely like the tip about letting go of the past. Honestly, this is hard for me, but I like the idea of a fresh start. We all make mistakes.

Tina July 02, 2012 | 4:58 PM

This was just what I needed. I think it's easy to get stuck in the routine of marriage. It's so important to keep things new by doing little things for eachother and really appreciating eachother. Simply acknowledging your husband when he walks in the door and giving him a huge hug will make him feel needed and desired by you.

olumide November 03, 2009 | 4:32 AM

am cool. and i want to even be a member November 02, 2009 | 2:09 PM

I think there are certain things that you need to do to bring the passion back and it's doing the same things you did back when you first started dating. That will let them know you are working to rekindle it. Then you should do sweet little things that you would have had it been a new relationship. Don't let yourself get lazy. Here are some ideas.

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