How To Love: Mom's Perspective
It's hard to admit, but sometimes mother does know best. Especially when it comes to relationships. Our columnist asks five moms what their daughters -- and you -- should know about love.
My mom taught me many things: don't talk when you have food in your mouth, get your oil changed frequently and always be on time.
But the most valuable lesson she ever gave me was, only give your love to someone who's worthy. I've followed that rule to the tee. And although I'm still single, I still think the adage holds true. Moms really do know everything. Their advice is so powerful, anyone can benefit.
Need a lesson from mom? I asked my mom-friends what they want to teach their daughters about love. Here are their words of wisdom:
A Lesson in Self-Esteem
"I want my daughter to [have] self-esteem. I think the more she thinks of herself, the less she'll be willing to settle," says Nicole Block, a new mom of one. I mean -- heck -- I waited for the right guy! I [also] want her to know that love can happen anywhere, anytime, and that it's pretty easy to spot. It's not about how the guy looks, or how much money he spends on you. It's about how you both laugh, how kind he is to you, and how much of himself he's willing to share. [My daughter, Anna's father] still makes me laugh every day, he's still extremely kind to me, and he's still willing to share every part of himself with me. That's the guy I want for my girl."
How to Love
May Walker, a mom of twins (one boy and one girl), thinks the most important lesson she can give her daughter is how to love. "Love your mate as you would love yourself, but don't make them your everything,"she says. "If you lose them, you are left with nothing, so never lose yourself!"
Show Love and Respect
"I would give two pieces of advice to my girls about love and dating,"says Betsy Carter. "The more love you give, the more love you get. If you give love to your pet, friend and family, they will love you back,"she explains. "Also, when it comes to boys, all boys want is to get into your pants, so respect yourself and others will respect you. That's what I can hope to teach them -- love and respect."
Use Hugs, Hearts and Heads
"I will show my daughter, Raiann, by example, that love needs to be carried out everyday. A simple 'I love you' or hug would be a part of my plan to let her know that showing your love to someone/something is important,"says Hannah Halili, single mom of one. "When it comes to relationships, I will tell her that she should always follow her heart, but also use her head at the same time -- be logical. Balance is always key."
Learn to Take Chances
Both Hannah and mom Jene Lupoli-Luciani believe taking chances is important when it comes to love and relationships. "I would tell my daughter to love freely and openly,"she explains, "even if it means you might get hurt in the end."After all, moms know better than anyone, the rewards of love are worth all of the risks.