Let's face it, ladies. Whether you are suffering from an impending period, a bloated day, stretch marks from a prior pregnancy, or you just are self-conscious because you have a few pounds to lose, there are days when you don't feel sexy -- and it all relates to tummy (or some other part of the body) fat.

The good news is that sex can make you feel better! The bad news is that you don't want to have sex because of the way you feel you look. So, I have compiled a few ideas that might make you focus less on the tummy and more on something more pleasurable, instead.

Find a new position
If you are lying on your back and you feel fat, you can just imagine the feel of your tummy spreading across the bed. This probably isn't the image that you want. This is why you should try something new! Tummy-hiding lingerieA good option is going to be "doggy style." If you are facing away from your lover, he is going to be less likely to notice that little bulge. Additionally, you can lean on your elbows rather than your palms to keep things even more secure. Another position that would work is the over the bed from behind position. Even on top facing away from your lover might work.
Wear something sexy
I know you're thinking this is hard to pull off when you're not feeling at your best. I don't know about you, but when I'm having one of those days I want to curl up in some old t-shirt and hide my fat the best I can. However, some sexy lingerie will cover you up in the right spots (you can buy it to suit your needs) and it will make you feel sexy -- which will make your sexual experience better. All in all, it's a win-win situation.

Give him control

If you like the missionary position, consider giving him the reigns for awhile. You can ask him (or beg him, for a kinkier effect) to hold your hands above your head. As he holds you down, your arms will be outstretched and that will offer a visible difference in your body, especially around the tummy. This also makes plenty of guys excited, and can add a new element to your bedroom fun.

Of course, these are just a few tips you can use when you're tired of the completely dark room and old t-shirts. There are many other options you can try! In fact, you might know some, too. If so, let us know what works for you on those unflattering days. I told you my secrets, now you tell me yours...

Shown above: Leigh Bantivoglio Lila Silk Mini Slip from Bare Necessities


Comments on "Tummy-hiding tips during sex"

lori November 15, 2010 | 3:16 PM

Alot of women who have babies do not marry, that leaves tons of woman walking around with these post pregnant bodies and people expect us to just keep on smiling. why would u go to a phychiatrist for knowing yur body just isnt that y anymore? So they can prescribe you crazy happy pills that are terrible f u anyhow? no sir. most of these women will never learn to love the flab. sorry its just not gonna happen. and working out does not help large weight lose after pregnancy, loose skin is always the issue and no matter wat u do it will be there unless you have $load of cash to drop on surgery. telling us to get in a y mood or be happy and fullfilled with our baby baring bodies is ridiculous when your not married. No way this artcile helps although 'Trouble"'s post is way more effective.

Dee September 09, 2010 | 10:41 AM

Shame on all you self righteous haters! After four children, and being a widow, while still relatively young, I have been afraid to have relationships because "I" don't like my stretch marks, and sags! THIS IS REAL LIFE! I am not a big woman, I don't need to diet! You obviously have the same insecurities if you found this page to begin with! Stop fooling yourself, or slamming another to make yourself feel superior! As a woman, we want to be y for OURSELVES first! With society as it is; full of flawless women on television and y magazines, do you think men don't see them? Do you think they don't compare? GET REAL! I look good in clothes, that's about it. It's not a character flaw, it's part of having children, which is a beautiful experience, but it does take its toll on many women's bodies! There are no easy cures or answers...we can't ever have our bodies back without spending a fortune, so appreciate someone who tries to offer uplifting advise for those of us that need it. If you don't need it...don't be here!

chynelle August 21, 2010 | 8:02 PM

I've had a baby and am proud being a mom but my body is totally wrecked. I got stretch marks on my breast,tummy and tighs i feel so embarrased infront my partner even he says it ok cause i had a baby.I dont feel y and just wanna have quick which is not likely me cause am very freaky an like to be in control but since my body is wrecked my selfesteem got very low.How can i get back a feeling of being y and taking charge in bed an not be ashamed of myself

Hazel June 03, 2010 | 3:00 PM

It takes all types, and not Every woman is a quick fix- you can't just say 'BE CONFIDENT & PROUD OF YOURSELF' and have it magically occur. Be realistic. Of course woman Should love themselves. But a lot of us, at one point in our lives or another, have an insecurity that is stubborn, and we know is probably really stupid, but we can't help it; and, in this case, you want to be intimate, but you're having trouble because you can't get around that nag in your head. So I completely agree with this article- she's just sharing things that could work. Relax, guys- how about taking a breath? Stop slamming the writer for trying to help- she's obviously been there.. Oh, and Lola? Just something to think about: your zero tolerance attitude towards a woman touching on a common insecurity- even with the purpose of communicating, HELPING and sharing advice, is counterproductive to your apparent goal for ultimate female empowerment, which is so much harder to achieve if we all look down at each other from our personal pedestals of enlightenment, as you seem to be doing. Which is a shame, since having every woman be confident and love themselves is something we should all be positive about, and not something we should claw at eachother for- especially if we're on the same side.

trouble April 07, 2010 | 2:02 PM

Finding something y to wear? Great idea. If you insist on being hung up on your body, (some) lingerie can hide (some) things, and it's fun to dress up. But your "new positions" ideas? Seriously? Tummies sag and swing far more on your knees than on your back! And on top, facing away from your lover? If you're that self-conscious about your tummy, wouldn't you be just as concerned about your butt? In general, I think trying new positions is great, but your arguments here seem extremely poorly thought out. My advice about feeling better about yourself is to do things that make you feel better about yourself. Going to the gym can be a drag for some of us, but almost everybody can find something healthy to do that's fun, whether it's yoga, bicycling, soccer, skateboarding... even a wii can get you doing a little more to exercise. Introduce a new, healthy food into your diet - most of us eat crap, and eating fresher, healthier things can give you more energy, and may help feel better about yourself too; I feel better about my body after eating a salad full of nuts, fruit and chopped veggies than I do after finishing off a bag of chips. Finally, seduce your partner. When is a routine you fall into, it's easy to feel that you're both just going through the motions, and to get hung up on self-doubt. When you're going out of your way to kindle passion and make the other person feel y, you end up feeling ier yourself. Or at least, that's all been my experience. I hope others find some of it helpful.

kisha February 11, 2010 | 12:10 AM

honestly i liked this article, i love my hubby and he loves me but it still doesn't take away the fact that i am emabarassed of my bulging belly and stretch marks, and i feel that there are alot of woman out there like this. im used to being a skinny petite girl with no belly so of course i feel uncomfortable with my new body i dont want my man to rub on my belly. you guys can scream and holler about how this writer should be telling us to be happy with our bodies, most of us know this but we don't really feel like this.

Alicia December 02, 2009 | 11:12 PM

The writer's bio says she's in college to be a therapist...looks like she still has a lot to learn. Two people who have together should be comfortable enough with each other that a little flab doesn't matter. If a guy is concerned about a woman's tummy, then he isn't someone she wants to sleep with anyway. And if a woman is too insecure about her tummy to be intimate with the man she loves, then she needs professional help, and not from the ignorant therapist who wrote this article.

Blake December 02, 2009 | 9:20 PM

I assume this is for single people? Most married guys are just thankful their wives let them have access. Here's a tip ladies, if you want to hide your belly during - put a big sweaty man on top of it.

Lisa August 27, 2009 | 5:05 AM

Why not just let the guy rub that tummy and tell you how y you are? Rubbing the tummy and letting the hands slip a little up or a little down is the best!

Zee December 08, 2008 | 10:34 AM

Thank you Lola! What a bizarre and shaming article. The LAST thing a man is worried about is the state of a woman's tummy anyhow.

Lola September 22, 2008 | 8:06 PM

How about teaching women to be proud of their bodies rather than helping them perpetuate their insecurity by showing them how to hide their perceived flaws?

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