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The percentage of our lives we spend having sex doesn't have to be depressing

Sasha Brown-Worsham has written for dozens of publications over the course of her years as a journalist and blogger. She lives outside NYC with her three children, husband, and multiple pets. She is working on her first novel.

New survey reveals the actual amount of time we spend in our lives having sex is way too low

As a culture, we spend an abysmally low amount of time engaged in the act of sex. A new survey from Reebok reveals that while we spend about 30 percent of our lives sitting and 41 percent of our lives engaged with technology, we actually only spend about one percent of our lives having sex.

How awful is that?

The sad truth is, they are right. When I think about my own life, I think I probably have more sex than the average couple married 13 years. But I also know three times a week hardly rivals the amount of time I spend on Facebook (countless hours each day). Or working on my computer (at least five hours a day). It can't compete with the time I spend exercising (two hours a day) or the amount of time I spend cooking (about seven hours a week). Yikes!

But it's not all terrible. Realistically, a good sex session that allows you to reconnect with your partner, have a couple orgasms and feel mighty satisfied need not take 12 hours. You can get that shite done in about 15 minutes, give or take. If you have to spend hours pounding away, something is amiss. Furthermore, this is not accounting for quality time. So while my husband and I might not spend hours engaged in intercourse, we are spending at least an hour or two chatting each day, at least an hour cuddling, and even more time holding hands or texting one another. We get quality time. We just don't always knock boots during it.

There is a common misperception, especially among men it seems, that sex must last and last (and last) to be good. Sometimes it is nice to have long, drawn out sex. But sometimes quickies are OK, too.

This survey is great in terms of personal accountability. I know I spend too much time on Facebook and need to spend more time connecting with people in my real life. There is a lot to be learned and yes, we all need to spend more time physically connecting with our partners. But unless you want to be rubbed raw, intercourse is not the only way to get there.

We all need to evaluate our time. But we also shouldn't feel ashamed if it's not exactly what we think it has to be.

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