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4 Tips to survive dating during the holidays

My work as a marriage and family therapist in Scottsdale, Arizona helps to  instill hope and change through the use of techniques including: Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, Parenting Skills Training, and Brief Solution focused therapy. I u...

How to survive dating during the holidays

Dating is difficult at times — frustrating in the journey and positively magical if success is found. Most singles might decide around the holiday season that looking for a date or relationship makes sense. The season brings about a feeling of love and relationships in a theme of celebration and togetherness. Being under the mistletoe alone is daunting!

So, what is a single person to do during this time of the year if she wants to embark on a journey to find a special someone? Most people who have been through this process might see the challenges in dating in a modern world around the holiday season; a date for New Year’s makes most singles cringe. Remember, it’s OK to go solo too.

Singles are bombarded with online dating websites and apps galore. How does one navigate this ever present barrage of possible dating opportunities with ease and success in finding a possible relationship? Let’s take the stress out of dating during the holiday season! To begin, there are a few steps that each person needs to ponder before they set out on their dating adventures.

Think about what you seek in a partner and if you would date someone with qualities that you possess? It is a thought-provoking question that all singles should ask themselves if they are thinking about entering the dating scene during the holiday season — or anytime actually. If you do not display the characteristics you seek in another, your journey begins with some self-reflection. You need to be able to work through the uncomfortable feelings and rejection to find success in the dating world.

A positive and optimistic approach to dating coupled with an insight into identifying feelings, maintaining confidence and creating healthy relationships will be your greatest tools.

Tip one

Keep your spirits lifted by being around friends and family during the holiday season. Support from your friends in established relationships is a great way to talk about your thoughts and feelings about a date. Get advice from some of your friends in healthy relationships or marriages. Ask them what makes their relationship work? Be around and celebrate with those people you cherish and get their thoughts. Positivity is great. Seek support from singles embarking on the same journey; being able to have support of someone in a similar situation will be great to share ideas.

Tip two

Embrace and engage in appreciating what you enjoy about the holiday season alone. If you enjoy spending time solo, you will be able to better appreciate the companionship you are seeking. Find a hobby: art, photography, reading, journaling or taking an online class to learn a new skill. Sit at your desk with a holiday hot cocoa or cup of tea and read and research different dating websites and apps or events you can join — or find some holiday events to be part of. Socialize; it’s a great time of the year! Get excited for your dating adventures.

Tip three

Have realistic expectations; the holiday season is a time where lots of people are busy and traveling. If you decide to begin dating through online sites, remember that patience is a virtue! You might need to begin the planning stages and start to meet new people after the new year if you feel like people seem busy or rushed during December. Remember, it’s not the quantity of those you are seeking but the quality. Be thoughtful in your process for meeting new potential dates and take into account that the holiday season might mean more people traveling in and out of your city.

Tip four

If you meet someone around the holidays, it’s OK to feel awkward about not knowing if you need to invite this person to your holiday event or even purchase a gift. Go with your instincts and what feels most comfortable. Maybe meeting someone new during the holiday season means it is too new of a relationship to exchange gifts. Cards are simple, so consider sharing a greeting card. Talk to them about this! I bet they feel the same, and it opens up sharing and conversations.

Try some of these tips or maybe be inspired to get out there and date with ease!

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