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Email is more romantic than an 'old-fashioned' phone call, says awesome study

Sasha Brown-Worsham


Sasha Brown-Worsham

Sasha Brown-Worsham has written for dozens of publications over the course of her years as a journalist and blogger. She lives outside NYC with her three children, husband, and multiple pets. She is working on her first novel.

When it comes to asking someone out technology is the better way to go

Technology gets a bad rap in dating. The idea of making or breaking up via text is often maligned by the media (and by girls over many glasses of wine), but the truth is, for many of us, email (and texting by proxy) is more romantic than voice calls or even being in person. And now science agrees.

According to a study from Indiana University, sending an email is more romantic than leaving a voicemail when communicating with a potential lover. Take that, etiquette mavens!

Co-author Alan R. Dennis said none of this is particularly shocking given how much technology has become a part of our lives.

“Email’s been in the popular consciousness since the 1990s and if you look at the new generation of millennials … they’ve grown up with email and text messaging, so it may not be as unnatural a medium as we at first thought,” he told

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I am somewhere between Millenial and Generation X and, even so, my entire courtship happened over email. True story.

My husband and I met in elementary school, but in high school I moved to the Northeast while he stayed in the Midwest. We lost touch and it was only after college, when he came to the Northeast for a job, that we re-met. And, via email, we got to know each other again. We talked about our dreams for the future, our friendships, our families, and sex. Lots of sex. My husband, who is generally not comfortable expressing himself in person, let loose on email.

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The flirtation was intense and hot and the computer gave him courage that a phone never could have given. Even better? Words are my life (hence why I am a writer) and his words made me crazy. Without email, it is no exaggeration to say, we would not be together. Now here we are 14 years later. We have three kids. We have lived in two cities, loved countless pets, and through it all remained totally, completely, hopelessly in love. And we owe it all to email.

So when people knock technology as being unromantic or sad, I just smile to myself. Without email, I wouldn't have all that I have. And that would be sadder than the death of the long phone call. At least to me.

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