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Sex in your 40s puts 20-something sex to shame

Ally Hirschlag is a producer/actor/writer who lives in Brooklyn, NY and buys way too many toys for her cats. She contributes to several publications, including Bustle, and The Nerve, and enjoys writing about all things woman. In her spar...

New study says you're having your best sex way after your roaring 20s

Popular entertainment makes it seem like people in their 20s are the ones running the sex gauntlet, but that doesn't necessarily mean they're enjoying themselves.

Illicit Encounters, the second most popular online dating site in the UK that specializes in extramarital affairs, conducted a survey which asked their members what age yields the most satisfying sex. While the percentages weren't overwhelming, a significant portion said their 40s, no question.

Thirty-seven percent of women and 34 percent of men on the site were all about sex 40s style. While this might surprise you considering the familial obstacles the come into play at that age, it made perfect sense to the people over at Illicit Encounters. One spokesperson told Metro, "40-year-olds have fewer hang-ups than 20-year-olds, and more experience under their wing — they really know what they want out of their intimate life — and that’s great sex!"

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Now that I'm just out of my twenties, this makes perfect sense to me. Sure, I was having a lot more sex in my early to mid-twenties, and while it was passionate, it was really hit or miss. Now that I'm 30, and have been with the same man for seven-and-a-half years, sex is definitely less frequent, but when it happens, it's pretty great.

Sex may not be nearly as adrenaline-filled when, say, we were trying to do it before my roommate came home, it's intimate in a way I never imagined it being.

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According to a survey conducted by HealthyWomen.org, 89 percent of women between the ages of 45 and 55 are super experimental in the bedroom. This percentage is surprisingly higher than any other age group (yes, even higher than those adventurous 20-somethings).

Women in their 40s and up also have a much better chance of orgasm than women in their 20s, according to OkCupid. Their study said 40 percent of 20-something women have trouble achieving an orgasm, compared to only 20 percent of women in their 40s.

This lack of orgasms in 20-something women may also have to do with men in their 20s not having reached their sexual prime yet. According to sex therapist David Schnarch on MSN, genital prime comes before sexual prime, which means 20-something guys are always up for it and can have a lot of sex. However, it doesn't mean they're having good sex. Sexual prime for men is actually in their 40s and 50s, which goes hand-in-hand with 40- and 50-something women having more successful orgasms.

Sex as you age is like anything else: Quality always trumps quantity.

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