Particularly when it comes to relationship advice.
While a sounding board is great, and talking through problems and experiences can help bring clarity, talking to the wrong people at the wrong time and taking their insight for fact as opposed to opinion can not only steer you wrong, but can completely derail a really good thing.
1. Don't sleep with him too soon. Whether it makes sense for you to have sex on the second date, fifth date, only once you are in a committed exclusive relationship, after 90 days or wait until you're married is something that only you and your partner can be the judge on. No matter how passionate your friend is on the matter, just like if you decided to wear ugly underwear, or even if you didn't shave your legs, in the heat of the moment it's your conviction that matters. Do you have a connection that warrants that type of intimacy? Are you more interested in a good time than deep emotional intensity? Is the moment just right so you're going with it? What matters when it comes to having sex is that you feel good about your decision, you don't feel pressured and you and he are on the same page. Once the decision is made, don't torture yourself with judgment or regrets and don't let your friends make you feel bad. Only you and your partner know what's right for your relationship (whatever that may be) at the time. Anyone else's opinion is irrelevant.
2. Dump him stat! Don't be hasty with the advice you get from your girlfriends. If she says that your guy is a jerk and you should immediately exit the relationship... take a beat to think about if that's really the right move for you or if your issues can be worked through. Is the problem truly a non-starter or a deal-breaker? Or is it a surface issue that can be remedied through better communication, deep understanding or therapy? Sure, your boyfriend truly might be acting like a jerk right now, but if you cut the line just because your friend said you should, you might quickly regret the decision, miss him and end up sending an "I made a mistake, please take me back" text shortly thereafter. Now you are risking being in an even worse place with the relationship. Why?
3. Follow the "rules" of dating. You might not even realize that the "rules" you are following are actually games. Well they often are. If you are abiding by "the rules," you might be allowing the conventional dating expectations to dictate when you should call, not call, make yourself available, pretend to be busy and tiptoe around the truth... which isn't lying, it's just not being exactly transparent. Well screw the rules! It's time to get real, break down your barriers, be your authentic self and step out your strategy to finally meet "the one," as opposed to just another "someone." It's time to follow your feelings. If you're interested in him, it's OK to be the first one to reach out, whether it's online or in person. Available tonight? Be spontaneous and go out with him on a whim. Get raw. Open up. Share something about yourself that's substantive. That's the purpose of the first date, right? Fly your red flags. Show your vulnerable side; it's the best way to create a real and deep soul connection. If you want to find that deep guttural love, the love that lasts, that hooks your heart and implants itself in your soul, you've got to screw the facade, the protective layer, the walls, the hiding of the feelings and the front. You have to be raw. After all, you're not looking for a friend. You're looking for love. If you want depth, you've got to dig deep and form your connection there.
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