When you really want to resolve an argument or when you want to talk about something that will most likely result in an argument, do not talk on the phone; have a face-to-face conversation.
It is so easy for words to be misinterpreted when you can’t really see the person. If you can’t hear them, this effect gets doubled, if not quadrupled. At times of fighting, little misunderstandings add up and fuel the fire even more. When you have a face to face conversation with your partner, you can tell what they actually mean just by their facial expressions and their gestures, which are obviously missing from phone calls.
It is much easier for both of you to be harsh on one another when you are not looking into each other’s eyes. He can be distant and cold in a text or over the phone, but seeing you and seeing the effect his words are having on you will stop him from being hurtful out of anger. And the same goes to women -- looking into your partner’s eyes, you won’t put up guards and give him the silent treatment.
What is said usually gives off 50-75 per cent of the meaning or the overall message, and the rest of it is usually delivered by non-verbal cues -- a look or a touch or a certain idiosyncratic behavior. If you are discussing a crucial topic of a sensitive nature, it is very important to see the way your partner is reacting. At times like that, what is not said is often as important as what is being said.
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