Dr. John Demartini is a leading authority in human behavior and leadership development.
Here are the top 10 relationship myths.
During the initial infatuation phase of a relationship, you see mostly the positive side of the person. There is a strong attraction, positive traits and potential for lasting happiness. However, that is just a delusion. Regardless of how well a relationship begins, you will eventually experience both sides of the person with as many challenges as support. A relationship will not change this natural experience of human emotions.
Living as if your soul mate will complete you will only lead to heartbreak. The illusions that you project onto your soul mate will inevitably fall apart when that person sometimes behaves in a manner that is not supporting you. A soul mate can be one person, or several people in your life, that fully complement you and help you find your own wholeness.
For every relationship beginning, there is another one ending. So the idea of forever is an unrealistic expectation. A relationship lasts as long as both people communicate with each other's highest values or priorities.
Relationships are not static and no one remedy will eliminate all your supposed troubles. As I mentioned above, life involves a balance of difficulty and ease; of liberty and constraint.
Sacrifice tends to breed resentment. Anytime you do something you do not want to do, or see no benefit to yourself in doing it, then you will become resentful. This may happen immediately, or subconsciously. It is wiser to master the art of communicating with each other's values.
Both lust and intimate lovemaking can continue to grow and evolve throughout a relationship as long as you understand and disable any unrealistic expectations that might shut it down. This includes the myths listed here.
Many people hang on to the idea that being with someone should happen naturally. However, a fulfilling relationship requires concentration, organization, effort and skill.
People can feel lonely in a crowded room. Loneliness is a function of how you perceive yourself relative to your environment. You can sleep right next to someone and yet feel a thousand miles distant, or be a thousand miles distant but feel as if they are close.
Children are unlikely to complete a union just as romantic partners are unlikely to complete each other.
There is no true opposite, only an apparent opposite. Every human has the same potential for love, anger, greatness, hope, despair, etc. What you see in a romantic partner is also present in you. It is just expressed in a different way.
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