It's a once-in-a-lifetime madhouse out there. From the crucible comes great wisdom, including these 10 truths that you will hold dear for the rest of your life, like the survivor you are.
Upon arriving at a music festival, you will immediately lose your car keys, your cell phone and every valuable piece of jewelry you've ever owned. Festivals are like the Bermuda Triangle for valuables.
Go ahead and wear that fanny pack, girl. It's not the coolest accessory, but you'll be the only one laughing when you are prepared with sunscreen, bug spray, medical gauze and wet wipes.
They're corn chips, which are practically a vegetable.
You can spot a music festival virgin by the intensity in their eyes. They're always running around, looking for a way to see all of the acts. Anyone who has survived a music festival knows that it is not possible — and that the quality of the acts you see will always matter more than the quantity.
If there's one fashionable accessory that you need to ditch, it is absolutely the shoes. Practical footwear reigns supreme.
An amazing jeweled headband matters not when you smell like a barn.
Yes, people should have learned this in college. But the intensity of the sunlight and the severity of the sweaty dehydration makes this wisdom more pertinent than ever.
Wet wipes are like the Swiss Army knife of personal hygiene.
You're going to be there for days, right? Bring lighter clothes for the middle of the day, but don't forget that you may need to bundle up a bit when the sun goes down.
We know, we know. You don't burn, you tan. After a few days of almost zero shelter, nothing but a tube of strong sunscreen will keep you from looking like a lobster.
You came here to see a show, so make sure you have a good view. Be patient but persistent, and you can work your way to the front of the crowd.
It should come as no surprise that after a weekend of screaming your head off, your throat will hurt (but still, you'll be shocked). Bring some cough drops, or at least a few extra bottles of water, to soothe that pain and get back to screaming.
Make the most of the experience — and all of your life's experiences — since you only live once. Just don't turn your newfound wisdom into an unfortunate #yolo tattoo.
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