1. Bring them cupcakes. There's a reason the expression isn't "baked goods can't buy you love." Because, well, they totally can. Nobody can turn down a bribe disguised as a baked good.
2. Don't steal their lunch... and make sure no one else does, either. Who wouldn't love a thoughtful little gift like this? Granted, you will know the truth, but they can trust you, right?
3. Surprise them with anonymous compliments. Don't believe the haters — flattery will get you everywhere in the business world. If you manage to do it via a fortune cookie note, well, that merits some major bonus points.
4. Don't be this guy. If your coworkers have to crawl out of their window Dukes of Hazzard style because you can't figure out how to park within the lines, they most certainly will not love you. Essentially, the absence of such jerky behavior will earn you their devotion.
5. Be the creeper who sneaks into your coworkers' offices before they get there to leave cutesy little notes. Sure, it's a bit off-putting that you're lurking around while they're still on their morning commute, but the sweet factor overshadows that.
6. Spring to action when something icky crosses the office threshold. It doesn't matter if you work with mainly men, mainly women, or a mixed crowd... when a huge spider or mouse makes a cameo, no one wants to be the one to take care of it. Be that person and you'll be the office hero.
7. Repeat after us: coffee, coffee, coffee. The allure of Starbucks is far too powerful for anyone to scoff at. Get to know your coworkers' favorite drink orders, and you might earn friends for life.
8. Also, respect the sanctity of minimal conversation before coffee. If you grasp this, you will earn their respect. If your earn their respect, the love will follow, my friend.
9. Leave memes on their desk. They can be motivating or sarcastic of just plain silly. It doesn't matter if you think them up or you choose from the vast selection in circulation on the internet. The bottom line is that memes make everyone happy.
10. Be funny. It's, like, the law of nature of something. Everyone loves a funny person. How the heck else are you going to get through eight hours of pushing paper at your desk job? You've got to laugh to keep from crying.
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