"Yeah, I just don't think that's ever going to work out for you."
You never feel better after talking with this person, even when you call to share exciting news. Naysayers are downers who will bring your good day to a screeching halt. They see the glass as half empty and cracked. When things are good, they complain; when things are bad, you want to wear your earplugs because they bark even more. Naysayers may think they're just telling it like it is and keeping it real, but in reality, they're just spreading gloom and negativity.
Why you should dump the naysayer: It's important to have people in your corner who support and encourage you. It's not about surrounding yourself with people who always tell you "yes," but rather being wary of the ones who are constantly negative and can never be happy for you.
"You know I never mind helping you out."
This is your go-to person who will bail you out of a jam every single time. You never have to stress out when you're in trouble because you know she'll be there, no matter what the scenario is. Though you may chalk it up to her being a good friend, she could actually be an enabler.
Why you should dump the enabler: If you find yourself around an enabler, is she helping you grow as a person? Or is she hindering your potential? Sometimes there's a fine line between being a supportive friend and being an enabler. Enabling can be draining and put a strain on a relationship. While you don't need naysayers constantly telling you "no," you also don't want to be around "yes" people who won't be honest about your negative behavior and tell you the truth when you really need to hear it.
"Can you pick up the check again? My wallet is M.I.A."
This friend seems to have a sudden case of amnesia whenever money or responsibility is involved. Maybe you find yourself paying for everything because your friend seems to conveniently forget her wallet at home whenever you go out, or she is nowhere to be found when it's time to repay you.
Why you should dump the moocher: Going out with freeloaders can take the fun out of friendships. Though it feels good to treat your friends to dinner or help them out, it shouldn't be one-sided. If you find yourself always picking up the tab, loaning out money (that's never repaid) or constantly doing favors, you may be a victim of a mooching friend who is taking advantage of your kindness. Don't let moochers drain your wallet and your energy.
"I know I told you I’d be there, but something else came up. Sorry."
Reliability is not a flaker's strong suit. You never know if she’ll commit to the plans you make, as she usually bails or goes M.I.A at the last second. You find it hard to take her word for things, and she is the last person you’d expect to come through in a crunch. Don’t hold your breath waiting for her to return your call, or even your text, because you may be waiting for weeks.
Why you should dump the flaker: Life happens, and unexpected things come up that may require a change of plans, but it can be frustrating to have friends who always cancel or renege on their promises or commitments. Canceling occasionally is understandable, but blowing someone off repeatedly is not. Friendships take effort from both sides, so if you find yourself always making the plans just to get stood up, you may want to rethink your relationship with your flaky friend.
"Let’s see who can turn more heads tonight."
Whenever you go out looking for a good time, you feel like you signed up for a competition instead. From clothes to achievements and careers, the competitor gets a thrill out of making everything a contest. Got a raise? Then she is working on a promotion. Got a new man? Then she is working on getting hitched first. The competitor is constantly finding ways to one-up you and usually doesn't like to share the spotlight.
Why you should dump the competitor: Though it’s always great to have friends who challenge and motivate you to do better, it can become tiresome dealing with a competitor who treats your friendship like a rivalry and compares her life to yours. It’s always better to encourage and do things big together without having to wonder if your friend is constantly trying to find ways to outdo you.
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