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7 Things that are way cooler to drag around than cabbage

A native of the storied coastal city of Charleston, South Carolina, Julie Sprankles has been a lover of words her entire life. As a Southerner, she certainly has what her mama calls “the gift of gab.” When she’s not writing, Julie can be...

It's a thing now

Teens in China are apparently dragging around cabbages on leashes like leafy little pets, but we can't help but think there are far better things to drag around than a hunk of produce. Here are a few of our picks.

Cabbage

Photo credit: danielvfung/iStock/360/Getty Images

A vacuum cleaner

There are plenty of benefits to dragging around a vacuum cleaner. First and foremost, its lifespan on a leash has got to be longer than cabbage. Plus, it's useful — if you find a power source, you can use your vacuum pet to do everything from clean up crumbs to pull up your hair.

A mailbox

Mailbox GIF

GIF credit: Brobible.com

Who doesn't love to get mail? Opening up your mailbox and finding something is one of life's simple joys. If you drag around a mailbox, everything you store in it and pull out later will feel delightfully like a present delivered via the postal system.

A bowling ball

Bowling Ball GIF

When you're dragging a bowling ball behind you on a leash, you don't have to worry about how bad you are at the actual sport. Not to mention, unlike cabbage, a bowling ball will just roll right over every bit of debris and every bump in the road, as opposed to getting snagged and basically turned into coleslaw along the way.

A cardboard box (or two)

Cardboard Box

A plain old cardboard box, when dragged around, is basically like a mobile hotel. You can literally pack your bed right into it and just pop open the flaps and crawl in when you're ready for some shut-eye. And if you're looking for a quick pick-me-up to put a smile on your face, a cardboard box also makes a great prop for pranks (aka, scaring the living daylights out of anyone who crosses your path).

A picture of Ryan Gosling

Ryan Gosling

Photo credit: The-Mommies-Network.blogspot.com

Does this need any further explanation? Suffice it to say, we feel as though a picture of Ryan Gosling would be far superior company to a head of cabbage. Is a head of cabbage going to keep you warm? Tell you how beautiful you are? OK, fine... the picture won't either. But a girl can dream, can't she?

A pillow

When it comes to usability, the applications are endless with a pillow — you can sit on it, lie on it, arm yourself with it for the impromptu pillow fight, buffer sound with it, etc., etc., etc. Bonus? Just take a cue from Mr. Pillowhead and use your "leash" to wrap the pillow on your head during the day, so you never have to be without a cushy spot to rest your cranium.

A robot

Wall-E GIF

GIF credit: animated-disney-gifs.tumbler.com

Because, well, c'mon... what's cooler than a robot? One of these little mechanical wonders would put your friends' cabbage pets to shame.

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