Foolproof Surprises

Pulling off a surprise party takes skill, organization, stealth and a lot of luck.

Woman hiding behind balloons

But seeing the expression on your victim's face at the moment of truth is well worth the extra trouble. With a little planning and just a few white lies and these tips, you'll succeed.

Zip it

The first rule of planning a surprise party is: Do not talk about the surprise party. The second rule of the surprise party is: Do not talk about the surprise party. Getting all of the party guests to keep the secret is notoriously difficult, but not impossible. 

Designate an accomplice

Having a partner in crime who does not live in the same house as the guest of honor makes it easier to store party supplies, track RSVPs, decorate the party venue and ensure that the guest of honor shows up at the right time and place. Make sure this person can keep a secret (and a straight face).

Keep RSVPs secret

A surprise invitation should make it crystal clear that this is a huge secret and that you are counting on guests not to spill the beans. Direct RSVPs to a private cell phone or e-mail (yours or your accomplice's), especially if you're planning the party for a spouse or someone who lives with you.

Set a dress code

Keep in mind that your surprisee will not appreciate arriving home to a formal soiree if she's decked out in sweatpants and sneakers. Ask guests to dress the same way the guest of honor will be attired.

Plan the diversion

Never assume that your guest of honor will arrive at the designated party venue at the right time without a babysitter. Have your accomplice take him out for a quiet dinner or movie, then head to the party at the designated time.

Park smart

If the party is at a home, ask guests to arrive at least an hour before your victim's expected arrival and instruct them to park around the block. Better yet, see if a neighbor will let you use her driveway. The last thing you want is to ruin the surprise at the last minute with 20 cars parked in front of the house. For the same reason, ban exterior party decorations.

Capture the moment

Plan to have someone capture the moment of surprise in a photo.

Make it memorable

Before the party, ask each guest to email you an anecdote about the guest of honor, and put them all together in a small book or photo album. During the party, take a Polaroid of each guest and paste the photo into a scrapbook with the corresponding anecdote. At the end of the party, the finished book makes a wonderful keepsake.

fake it

One fun way to keep the real party under wraps is to either plan or even throw a smaller "fake" party on a different date. This way, the guest of honor thinks that his birthday is being remembered and will not suspect a larger surprise birthday party.

time it right

Another way to keep the element of surprise is to hold the party before or after the actual birthday, or at an unusual time. While the birthday girl may be suspicious of an outing in the evening, she will not be expecting a birthday brunch or afternoon picnic.

On the Big Day

Ask for help: The day of the party is the time to ask your accomplice for extra help. One person should coordinate the party guests, while the other "babysits" the guest of honor.

Work it into the routine: Try to plan the surprise birthday around something that is routine so as not to arouse suspicion. If the birthday girl always takes a dance class at a certain time, arrange for the guests to be at her house when she arrives home. If the birthday boy always goes out with the guys on Friday night, arrange for the party to be at their usual hangout.

Gather a flock of early birds: The person coordinating the guests needs to be sure that all of the guests have arrived at least a half-hour before the guest of honor is due. This will avoid awkward moments and flimsy explanations.

Keep it in: Decorations can make a big impact, but be sure none can be seen from outside. Helium balloons floating on the ceiling, crepe paper flowing through the room, and confetti ready to be thrown all make the surprise that much more memorable. If the birthday boy is a really good sport, you can give all of the guests a can of Silly String to launch as he arrives.

Mask your joy: At some surprise birthday parties, guest hold masks made from a head shot photo of the birthday person with eyeholes cut out of it. Imagine the surprise of walking into a room full of look-alikes!

Host it right: Unforgettable parties begin and end with a good hostess that welcomes each and every guest with open arms. The hostess of all hostesses provides an inviting atmosphere filled with mood, food, beverages and entertainment.

party Ideas

While homes and restaurants are traditional venues for surprise birthdays, here are a few more unusual ideas.

Table for two

This is a fun but quiet surprise where the party comes to the guest of honor -- appropriate for those who might scare easily. For this birthday surprise, rent out either the entire restaurant, or as many tables as you need to accommodate guests. The guest of honor and her companion arrive at a nearly empty restaurant and are seated at a table in the center of the room. One by one, the surrounding tables fill up with friends and family of the birthday person. Coincidentally, the entire restaurant is soon full of the entire party -- surprise!

Uptown express

Rent a large shuttle or minibus and fill it with party guests at a secret location. Decorate the inside of the bus with crepe paper or balloons to make it more festive.  The guest of honor and companion are out on the street as they walk to a restaurant, or run another errand. The bus pulls up to the prearranged corner with all of the friends and family on board -- surprise! The guest of honor then boards the bus, which can take everyone to the designated party location.

A kidnapping

For this party, the guests arrive at the birthday girl's house in cars, or even a limo. They "kidnap" the guest of honor and whisk her away for a day of wine tasting, a spa getaway, or anything else that she would appreciate. You need to have someone in the household as an accomplice, so that he can quietly pack a bag full of anything that the guest of honor might need for the day. This type of party is particularly effective if the kidnapping happens early in the morning.

have fun with the food (and the drinks)

Surprise parties are a great time to get creative and fun with food and refreshments. Throw rules and food pairings out the window, and focus on serving food that the guest of honor loves. Whether that means caviar and ice cream sundaes or fast-food hamburgers with baked Alaska, surprise her with a buffet of her favorite indulgences and comfort foods. Here's a great surprise party recipe from epicurious.com:

Tequila Surprise

Ingredients:
1-1/2 ounces tequila
1 ounce Malibu coconut rum
3 ounces orange juice
3 ounces pineapple juice
1 ounce Chambord raspberry liqueur
Wedge of lime
Wedge of pineapple
Raspberry

Directions:
1. Fill a margarita glass with crushed ice. Add tequila, rum and juices.

2. Stir briefly, then drizzle Chambord over drink.

3. Garnish with wedges of lime and pineapple, and drop a raspberry into the glass.

Wherever you choose to hold the surprise birthday party, the main ingredients for success are secrecy, coordination, and fun. With a little advanced planning and just a few white lies, the guest of honor can easily be kept in the dark. Plan the type of party he will love, gather his friends, and be ready to give him the surprise of his life.

Tags: surprise parties

Comments

Comments on "Surprise party tips"

Bella May 21, 2013 | 7:05 PM

I agree - the only thing that spoilt my baby shower party was the way I looked. It wasn't a traditional all female baby shower, my husband decided to surprise me with a party with all our friends. I must admit - be planned it extremely well. When he showed up that day I was a bit annoyed because we had plans to do something and he disappeared for 3 hours (little did I know that he was organizing the last few things over there). So when he came back home and suggested to take me for lunch as apology - I decided that we would go somewhere casual and didn't bother to dress up. I was wearing my t-shirt and maternity overalls. Didn't bother with make up either - just brushed my hair and put on a jacket. So... It was a nice party and I love my husband for doing that. But although I would never tell him - I positively HATED showing up there dressed down like I did!!! Seeing all my girlfriends all dolled up and on high heels and with make up only made me feel worse((( That part really made me uncomfortable. I still enjoyed tha party but... somebody (my husband or older daughter) should have made sure I looked more presentable!

surpriser April 21, 2013 | 10:29 AM

wow. I usually don't do this but I have to comment. it does not matter if a person is having a bad hair day or not the point is that all of these people came together to celebrate you! granted a surprise party is trickier for women but a quick trip to the store ( or having their cosmetics and toiletries ready) and a stop in the restroom should give a quick boost to your look. Its always a good idea tohave your partner in crime plan to go out and go to the party instead. "its my party and ill cry if I want to" stops at 10 yrs old...so stick a smile on your face a revel in the fact the someone(s) loves you enough to go through the stress ad strife of throwing a secret party.

surprisee January 20, 2013 | 7:32 AM

If you can't get the person there looking nice, forget the stupid surprise. I am still trying to recover from a recent surprise party in which I looked the worst that I could possibly look. I was getting ready to color my hair, had my worst oldest clothes on and had let my hair get extra oily so the color would take. That was the moment my husband told me there was an emergency and we had to go the aid of my 89 year old uncle. When I realized I had been taken to a surprise party looking like that, my face turned bright red and I cried. Everyone was uneasy, as they all knew how upset I was. And my mother, who paid for the party, will never have the satisfaction of knowing she had given me pleasure. Whenever she brings it up, I thank her for the party, tell her it wasn't her fault but I don't want to talk about it. So nobody won. BE SMART. If you don't know how to do it right, FORGET THE STUPID SURPRISE. DO NOT HUMLIATE THE PERSON YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE HONORING.

Amy December 14, 2012 | 8:58 AM

i love the tips (helpful alot) but what if my mom finds out ?

salma ahmed kamal October 27, 2012 | 12:37 AM

i like these ideas and i'll do it :):)

liz May 31, 2010 | 4:34 PM

ya this is good stuff but what if she gets an invite to someone else party but really for her and she sort of knows its for her?

peter petigrew February 19, 2010 | 1:53 PM

This site is extremely helpful, however: it is just like every other party website and is completely unoriginal.

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