Warning: If you have a low threshold for nausea or tolerance of creepy-crawly things, stop reading now. Because what one woman discovered in her carton of Vita Coco coconut water is deeply disturbing and may indefinitely put you off any beverage that comes in an opaque carton.
New Yorker Barbara Kline was innocently sipping her refreshing tropical drink when she discovered what appeared to be some kind of mutant octopus squid creature. Kline reported that she'd taken a few chugs before she noticed that something seemed off — the water had a weird yellow color and was super-slimy. She shook the bottle and heard a clunking, swishing sound.
She cut open the carton and discovered this repulsive mass.
Kline alleges that she's been experiencing days of vomiting and diarrhea since the incident, which occurred on April 25. Yikes! Seriously, is it safe to eat anything anymore? You think you're making a healthy choice until you find a scorpion in your spinach, a dead bat in your salad and now this.
Grubstreet reports that a Vita Coco rep has been trying to connect with Kline to rectify the situation: "We have been trying to help this consumer since April 26, 2017, and have been in touch with her every day this week... To give her 'answers' as she has requested, we or a credible laboratory need to test the original product."
Doing that seems difficult, though. The company offered to come pick the nasty creature up from Kline's house so it could be tested, but she's afraid they'll tamper with it and she'll lose the only evidence she has. She says she has been trying to get in touch with the FDA, but to no avail. The Vita Coco rep, meanwhile, thinks it's strange that she's had the product for 14 days and won't relinquish it for testing.
I'm not sure what exactly is going down right now or who is pulling shenanigans on whom. But I do know that I'm going to have a hard time drinking coconut water out of anything other than a fully transparent bottle until this all gets sorted out and we figure out what, exactly, was swimming in Kline's carton of coconut water. *Shudder*
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