The birth mother's perspective
Mom with baby

Oxygen's new series "I'm Having Their Baby" provides viewers with a look at the adoption experience by chronicling birth mothers as they face the decision whether or not to place their children with another family.

Adoption from the birth mother's view

We often see stories of adoption from the point of view of the adoptive parents or the adoptees, but there's a third party to every adoption -- the birth mother.

Oxygen Media recently announced the premiere of its newest docu-series I'm Having Their Baby on Monday, July 23, at 11PM ET/PT. The series aims to provide viewers with a sneak peek into the adoption process by capturing the often untold stories of birth mothers as each one is faced with the difficult decision to place her baby for adoption.

Each hour-long episode chronicles the heart-wrenching, powerful stories of two birth mothers struggling with unplanned pregnancies as they decide whether to place their babies in the hands of another family.

I'm Having Their Baby preview

Get a sneak peek into I'm Having Their Baby in the video below and visit to learn more about the show -- or share your story if you are a birth mother going through something similar.

Adoption triad

The adoption triad -- the three-sided relationship between the birth parents, adoptive parents and adoptees -- is often difficult. Though adoptions can benefit all parties and be a very beautiful experience, they also can be extremely challenging. While most private domestic adoptions were closed in decades gone by, nowadays, the trend is toward open adoption. Open adoption can provide birth mothers who are not ready, willing or able to parent with the opportunity to get to know and select a family for their child. This process can make the incredibly difficult decision a little easier for the birth mother as she knows that she's leaving her baby in loving, capable hands and that she may be able to maintain some sort of relationship with the child (and the adoptive family) in the future.

Celebrity adoptions

In recent years, a number of prominent celebrities have have adopted children through private domestic adoption and international adoption. Though Angelina Jolie may be the first one to come to mind, she's certainly not alone. Sandra Bullock, Kristin Davis, Edie Falco, Joely Fisher, Katherine Heigl, Hugh Jackman, Diane Keaton, Nicole Kidman (and Tom Cruise), Madonna, Ewan McGregor, Denise Richards, Meg Ryan, Charlize Theron and many more celebrities are adoptive parents.

More about adoption

Two babies and no pregnancy for Jillian Michaels
Adoption photos: The moment I became a mom
The realities of adopting from foster care


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Comments on "Oxygen Media set to premiere I'm Having Their Baby"

mee June 12, 2013 | 8:08 PM


MBlanco July 26, 2012 | 4:43 PM

Pure exploitation. Where is the protection of families and support for the women who are obviously in need of real family support - not vultures who want to help by separating mother and child? Coercing a mother before birth is fiendishly brutal and calling it an adoption plan is just to sugar coat an abduction.

secondmom July 18, 2012 | 11:24 AM

I am an adoptive mom in an open adoption with my son's first mother.I have not seen this show, but the title disgusts me. My son's mom did not get pregnant for me. She did not have my baby. She had her own child, and after long, painful, thoughtful consideration she chose adoption for him. The day I brought my son home was one of great joy and enormous sadness. 6 years in, our open adoption is stronger and more open than ever. Yes, I am a mom,and would do anything for my child--ANYTHING-- but nothing I ever do will ever change the fact that he had another mother first, and that the bond he has with her is forever.

Etropic July 17, 2012 | 1:10 PM

Don't we have enough GARBAGE of "Reality shows"? You want REAL, you want TRUTH? Try following this girls AFTER the cameras are gone, the aparents have reneged on their promises,(uttered only to GET their hands on a baby) and these women are scarred for life with no one to talk to because no one gives a about them; as long as the infertile or too-old-to-have-another-baby couple GET "THEIR" baby that's all that matters. BITTER MUCH? is what I get told often. NO I have seen it happen to MANY others, I was lucky as it didn't happen to me. It still pisses me off though. This show just further exposes how low we have sunken as a society in how we treat each other. Women are absolutely the worst as apparent by this show.

Susan Anthony July 03, 2012 | 5:35 PM

This totally disgusts me. . .coercion of the natural mothers to relinquish their children. Even the trailer was hideous. The crying young mother holding her baby and being hugged and comforted by the very people seeking to take her baby from her is the worst form of manipulation and exploitation. Networks that promote these types of shows for profit at the expense of mother's and their babies is a travesty. I will never watch this show and posted it on my FB page for all to see with my comments about it. Oxygen, you ought to be ashamed! I agree with other posters that an expose of the adoption industry's multi-million dollar business would make better TV. But, I forgot, Oxygen aspires to the same level of greed and profits at the expense of human lives as does the adoption industry. You have no shame?

julie j July 03, 2012 | 10:49 AM

This is one offensive show that I will definitely not be watching! This is neither entertainment nor "beautiful." Adoptees and their vulnerable families have been exploited enough by the media, the adoption industry, and by prospective/adoptive "parents." And the atrocities continue on throughout the adoptee's & their natural family's lifetimes. Adoption is a preventable tragedy that never has to happen to anyone. (No, adoption is NOT required to love & care for any child, even those who truly do not have any family. The truth is almost all babies adopted domestically DO in fact, have family who want and love them. Their families are just low on resources at the time. They need assistance, not having their families permanently torn apart!) For every legal adoption that does happen, it is a sad representation of how society has failed that baby & his/her family. A better program would be one that exposes the corruption, the lies, the lack of ethics, the pain of the broken promises, the child trafficking, and the violations of human rights in adoption. Any joy derived by the baby-receiving/profiting parties in adoption, comes at great expense to the other parties. Adoption needs to be exposed for what it really is. A much better program would explore solutions to problems that lead to any perceived "need" for adoption. Thank you.

Carlynne July 03, 2012 | 7:06 AM

I'm saddened and horrified by this show. What a shame that a vulnerable, pregnant woman is being exploited not only by the multi-billion dollar a year, for-profit adoption industry, but also by the producers of this show for the sake of ratings. If they really wanted to do a documentary they could consider exposing the industry's practices for what they are - coercion. Separating a mother and her baby is a tragedy, NOT entertainment!

Matriarch July 02, 2012 | 8:10 PM

Oh, FFS, come out of the fog. There's nothing remotely Christian about adoption. Caring for the widows and the fatherless meant collectively, as in men getting killed off in wars and such. Furthermore, stop twisting the Word of God to suit your own desires, rightly divide it! It's cruel to tell an infertile couple? Well, it's more cruel NOT to tell my real birth circumstances. The bible also has plenty to say about lying. (and coveting!) You believe in God, then seek God to conceive like other women in the bible. Don't be lazy and just snatch up someone else's child calling it "God's will". It's idiotic to compare the adoption industry with adoption into God's kingdom. He created us, didn't He? You have to consider the language and the context of the times. I'm not even going to get into this. Suffice it to say that God thinks more of a single mother doing everything she can to honor her responsiblity and raise her child, than the coercion, avarice, secrets and lies that accompany adoption. Being adopted into a "forever family" doesn't remove ship status, btw. Once a , always a . Oh, but because that danged piece o' paper says so, it MUST be true... :/ Well, that piece of paper plainly says that I did not exist before I was adopted! Which is absolutely not true. Funny how one little document can carry so much weight... and says I was born to my adoptive parents, have no other siblings when in fact I have nine, and completely denies the truth of anything to do with my actual birth.

danielle prince July 02, 2012 | 6:57 PM

I am a surrogate mother and id love to be on the show please contact me.

This is Crap July 02, 2012 | 1:57 PM

This is SICK! Sick as ever. I can't believe that you are calling them birthmother's before they place THEIR children. You are coercing them to abide by to be nice to the APs (adoptive parents), when in all actual reality, this is by far great. This is horrible. For those that want a child, look into other methods, including the FOSTER CARE SYSTEM! Infant adoption has became a brokering of sorts. I am disgusted & outraged at this show. Just as bad as TLCs Birthmoms & MTVs 16 & pregnant. Condoning it. ... this is the adoption agencies screaming out - WE NEED MORE PREGNANT WOMEN TO TALK INTO GIVING UP THEIR BABIES!!! This is bullsh**

Becky July 02, 2012 | 10:22 AM

I am very much looking forward to this show. As an adoptee, I think introducing pop culture to the world of adoption is a fantastic thing. Adoption is not the only answer to an unplanned pregnancy, but for many women it IS a good option. Some women are unable or UNWILLING to parent their child. I am grateful that my birthmother gave me life, and I could never thank her enough for the sacrifice that she made to ensure that I would be cared for, but my mom and dad didn't "play house" with me. They prayed for years for a child, and God answered their prayers. To tell an infertile woman that "god doesn't want you to have a child" is cruel. God has called us all to be adopted into His kingdom. He has commanded us to take care of the widows and fatherless. Adoption IS a part of his holy plan. Bravo to Oxygen for having the courage to produce such a series in today's overly politically correct world.

tootall July 02, 2012 | 8:05 AM

What this will do is prompt countless infertiles to want to join the "wonderful process" They'll fork over their life savings to an adoption agency only to find out they are 1 of 100s vying for each possible baby placed.Next.they begin an ad campaing by plastering their profile(they all look the same-except for the near elderly ones)to"get the word out"which doesn't change the odds-numbers don't lie-People who can't have kids need to get over themselves and face facts.People who make $ off them need to get a real job.

Crystal July 02, 2012 | 5:37 AM

Let me add something else - on your article listed below about adoption & mother's on mother's day.. why is it that all you show are international adoptions or 1 from foster care. None of those are INFANT US adoptions. Hmm. So, why are you showing this show. Here is a link to the adoptive photos on SheKnows http://www.sheknows/parenting/articles/958441/adoption-photos-mothers-day/page:17. Which the first one is the editor, I believe, who adopted from Vietnam. STOP THIS SHOW!

Crystal July 02, 2012 | 5:14 AM

This show disgusts me. I hope you DO NOT get any ratings over this show. The adoption agencies depict adoptive couples as Christians, correct? YUP! My take, if God wanted you to have biological children, then you would have them. He does EVERYTHING for a reason. What about all of the children in foster care that was abused by their natural parents, why aren't the adoptive parents going after them? Why is infant adoption this way? It's became human trafficking & it is sickening. Shame on you Oxygen for depicting this story. These women obviously LOVE their babies, tremendously. These agencies force adoption, but don't help women get more information & help to keep & raise their babies. I am not completely anti-adoption, but I believe that there needs to be a better way in the US to help single mothers RAISE their babies. Even if they are young. I had my first at 17, who has NEVER seen her father, I did it alone. She is 11, straight A (principal's list) & wonderful. You have all white couples adopting other races. HOW DO YOU THINK THESE CHILDREN ARE GOING TO FEEL? Out of place exactly. And open adoption isn't always carried through my every adoptive parent. OXYGEN please do your damn research!!!! I will NEVER watch another one of your shows until you have one that gets the damn story straight! This is ONE SIDED! These women are suffering. SHAME ON YOU!!!

Ws Birthmom July 02, 2012 | 3:29 AM

This makes me ill. You want a real story? Here is what open adoption is like. This shows the EXTREME INSECURITIES that adoptive parents can have and how they are fueled by it to not let anything bring down their fantasy that adoption is always and forever best. No matter the circumstances. There is no triad. The is no such thing as an 'open adoption', ALL power shifts to the adoptive parents once the natural parents upon signing on the dotted line, no matter the lies, half-truths or non-disclosure of information that occurs in order to get them to do so. Then, once all the truth comes out, it is too late for the natural parents to do anything about it. They are at the mercy of the adoptive parents to see their child....and there's nothing they can do about it unless they have an endless supply of cash, because it will take one heck of a court battle to get an open adoption 'agreement' enforced. Since many give their children to strangers via highly paid adoption agencies, many times due to financial reasons, they will never have the resources to have it enforced. Here's the EVIL in adoption, now this stuff, isn't made up, it really happened and I'm living it today. It is hell on Earth. http://wsbirthmom.wordpress/2012/03/29/the-evil-in-adoption/

Ws Birthmom July 02, 2012 | 3:11 AM

You have completely missed the boat to put your ratings through the roof. Telling the TRUTH if how domestic infant adoption is done today. The different coercion tactics as this show is doing by referring to the expecting mothers as birth mothers. If you knew the history of the term and why it was created would you change it? Do your homework. Also, there is NO triad. The control is shifted to the adoptive

Stephanie July 01, 2012 | 5:56 PM

Not all adoptions are bad for the child. My 3 siblings were adopted as was my neice. All of them would have faced a life time of suffering had they stayed with their egg and sperm donors. All 4 of these children were born to drug and alcohol addicts. Their parents treated them horrible so they were taken. My little brother was almost sold and had a nurse not heard the egg and sperm donor, he would have been sold like some animal. I know some people who were adopted and feel like they have had a wonderful life. They love their adoptive parents. Do not speak for everyone and generalize adoption situations. Everyone has different circumstances!

Philippa Hope-Hornsey July 01, 2012 | 9:05 AM

This article says it all about how this show is going to be a 'feel good' one glamourising how 'wonderful' adoption is. For a mother who was coerced into surrendering this is one show that I wont be watching as it is pressure of a different kind making out that adoption is the loving, selfless option. The reality is being a mother is the selfless, loving option. I can see in 18 - 20 years time it will be the 'old timers' like me who will be picking up the pieces when these mothers have a wake up call of the realities of surrendering. Calling them birth mothers is offensive, they are mothers. They are NOT having some body else's baby they are having THEIR own babies and will still be mothers even though they are surrendering. When are people going to get it that it's far better to give mothers practical help to raise their children? Adoption should always be in the child's best interests NOT making mothers feel they have no other choice, that it's loving, it's selfless .... Shame on the producers and potential adopters who will do anything including emotional blackmail to get a baby.

Julie July 01, 2012 | 4:54 AM

As an adoptee, I am revolted by this show. It will never be "their" baby. They can play pretend parents all they want, it will always still be the child of it's natural mother. I cannot begin to tell you how much adoption has messed up my life. Why doesn't this station do a show showing the horrors of adoption instead of glorifying it? Why not do a show about how adoptees are given falsified pieces of paper instead of their real birth certificates and maybe help us get antiquated laws changed so that adoptees can learn their true identities?

Jeanette Yamamoto July 01, 2012 | 12:03 AM

The adoption industry has exploded into a lucrative multi-billion dollar business. It is now normal practice to displace children from their families under the guise of "child protection." We--adopted people and families of adoption loss--are now, as a unified whole, holding adoption agencies accountable. If you want to know the truth about adoption look into the lives of adoptees and mothers, fathers, families of loss who were separated because of adoption. If you are thinking of adopting please join our group to learn the truth before making any next move. https://www.facebook/groups/AdoptionTruth/members/ I advice not to watch this show. It is poison to women and poison to humanity.

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