No, I'm not crying. There's just something in my eye. I was chopping onions for lunch, I swear. I'm not crying — YOU'RE CRYING.
OK, maybe I'm crying. But it's just because Jenny Slate and Chris Evans are making me do it again. Seriously, those two are destroying hearts and souls lately. Their breakup is cuter and more loving than any actual relationship I've ever had. They shouldn't be apart, and the photos from the Gifted premiere last night are just more proof of that.
Look at how lovingly they look into each other's eyes. Look at the tenderness in that embrace. Seriously, keep looking because I need another cry break.
All will not be right in the world until Evans and Slate are back together. They were made for each other, and we simply won't stand for this breakup. Remember all the sweet things they've said about each other? Like when Evans said about Slate, "She's my favorite human. She's the best." And before that when Slate said about Evans, "His heart is probably golden-colored, if you could paint it." And how both of them said those remarkably sweet things about each other after they broke up?
So anyway, if anyone needs me, I'll be crying giant tears into my Ben & Jerry's pint. Do not disturb. Unless, of course, Chris Evans and Jenny Slate get back together — in that case, please disturb away.
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