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Two couples are headed for splitsville on Married at First Sight

My work as a marriage and family therapist in Scottsdale, Arizona helps to  instill hope and change through the use of techniques including: Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, Parenting Skills Training, and Brief Solution focused therapy. I u...

The big lesson on Married at First Sight is that marriage shouldn't be this hard

On Tuesday night, Married at First Sight’s Heather and Derek chose to part ways and divorce. There is no reason this couple has to remain married if one or both partners feel like this match is not working for them. The marriage can’t be all about work in the first two weeks of any union; it needs to be focused on the growth as a couple in a positive direction. Heather and Derek did not experience enough positive moments of connection to overcome their moments of conflict. Choosing to part ways which appeared to be a fitting solution.

More: Your friends might be right about your bad relationship

Additionally, Sonia and Nick seem to be struggling. Since the second episode, I had some reservations about Nick’s inability to communicate his feelings and thoughts to Sonia. It's even more obvious in this episode it is a problem for him. In the latest episode, he allows this to bother him so much that he gets angry and upset when Sonia brings it up again and he storms out of the living room, telling her that he did what she always does (not communicate.) His behavior appeared to me to be inappropriate and hurtful. He continues to tell the camera that he is not attracted to her. Sonia eventually packs her belongings and leaves. I applaud her response and agree that she did not need to stay in a situation that was so painful. Sonia appears to have a good sense of how good relationships work. She values herself and this is an important lesson for anyone to see. While the audience is left unsure if they will stay together or not, but I would guess that Sonia probably does not want to be married after that incident.

More: Married at First Sight couples have it rough when it comes to arguments

Here were four of the biggest lessons from the episode:

1.Be in charge of your own feelings and thoughts in mindful ways. Emotional intelligence is valuable. Read up on developing emotional awareness.

2.Communicate your feelings and thoughts to your partner don't let them build up. Practice kindness in words and express yourself in healthy ways. Communication skills can be developed by working with a professional.

3. Marriage shouldn't be so hard so early. Couples need to be able to manage conflicts.

4.Dating long-term before marriage is useful to learn about yourself and the other person and how they show up in relationships.

More: Married at First Sight: All the couples have chemistry... will it be enough?

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