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The Bachelorette overnight dates reveal a whole lotta loving going on

My work as a marriage and family therapist in Scottsdale, Arizona helps to  instill hope and change through the use of techniques including: Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, Parenting Skills Training, and Brief Solution focused therapy. I u...

Is JoJo really in love with both Jordan and Robby?

Last night on The Bachelorette, JoJo told us that she feels like she can fall in love and be happy with all the contestants before they began their overnight dates.

More: JoJo's hometown dates may have stirred up troubling relationship drama with her men

I feel like there is an intriguing phenomenal that occurs on The Bachelorette each season when the magic of TV entertainment and the idea of romance occurs in such a tangled way that makes recognizing true love incredibly difficult. The show's fascinating process implies love can occur multiple times in the same time frame with several suitors fighting for her hand in marriage. It makes me wonder if it is this even possible, or does it just cheapen real love and true feelings? I don't doubt the sincerity of the contestant's desire to find this illusive type of love — just that the show gives them any chance at something genuine.

Robby was the first to have his overnight date, starting in a market in Thailand. Robby seemed to believe that JoJo’s feeling of love is reciprocated for him. The date continued at dinner where JoJo had an interesting conversation with Robby about the appropriate time to wait to actually tell someone you love him or her since Robby told JoJo quite early on in the show. She told us that she knows she loves Robby and wants her own love story, and she found this with him. This is the first proclamation of love. Is it real love though? Time will tell.

During Jordan's overnight, we heard the same sentiments that she was falling in love with him as well. I thought she was beginning to ask some great questions to him when she wanted to know how he knew he was falling in love. It seemed like she was trying to sort out what love really means. I think this curiosity she has about how each man knows he is in love with her is a thought-provoking question, and she should ask more of these questions.

More: The three D's that could be the harbinger of doom for your relationship

Chase was the final date of the night, and there appeared to be lots of lighthearted fun and laughs until he exited before the overnight. JoJo did not find love here, which realistically makes sense, but he does feel misled. His statement is probably one of the most honest things heard on reality TV when he tells her that he loves her and she says she does not feel the same way. He questions why she allowed him to say that if she did not reciprocate because he feels that he put himself out there only to be sent home. Apparently, he leaves feeling quite embarrassed, upset and confused as to how this happened in an odd moment when he was opening up and sharing his truest feelings about her.

True love is a rare thing and typically goes hand in hand with a commitment for exclusiveness. It is something that builds with time and is precious and valuable (we don’t just fall in love with everyone). But, on these dating shows, the audience usually sees multiple love stories at once. Can this really be that kind of true love? I'm doubtful that it is, but it does not mean it is not a precursor to something more genuine. The real kind of love that people seek is not easily found and unlikely to exist with multiple people in such a short time frame.

More: How did Alex misread his relationship with JoJo so badly?

The magic of the show and the game to find a more exciting theme each season is probably why we're seeing multiple loves on the show this year. But hopefully JoJo can find that true love at the end. We will see next week.

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