I know I might catch some heat for this opinion, but I think it's finally time someone asks the question: Is The Bachelor's Ben Higgins really that nice of a guy?
Higgins' season started out so promising. He seemed genuinely interested in getting to know each woman for who they are, he really seemed crushed every time he had to make the choice about who to send home at the weekly rose ceremony and — let's be real — he handled the situation with Lace Morris with more grace and kindness than most 26-year-old men would ever be able to muster up.
But as the season went on, Higgins started pulling some maneuvers that led me to believe that the nice-guy reputation he had earned during his The Bachelorette tenure was really all for show.
Let's start with the glaringly obvious. What he did to JoJo Fletcher was pretty douche-bag-errific. He clearly knew that he had stronger feelings for Lauren Bushnell by the time he uttered the words "I love you" to Fletcher. Maybe it was a moment of weakness or impulsiveness on Higgins' part, but if it was, he didn't make matters any better by continuing to tell Fletcher he loved her every time he saw her after he originally said the words. Anyone with a heart knows you don't say "I love you" unless you really, really mean it. So if there's a good chance you're going to be dumping that person in the near future, you should probably hold off.
Furthermore, if I was Bushnell, I'm not so sure I would even want to be with a guy who was so wishy-washy with his feelings. If I knew that my fiancé was throwing the L-word around all willy-nilly and had even told someone else they loved them after he said the same thing to me, well, that's just a recipe for questioning the weight of your significant other's sentiments for the rest of the relationship.
Why do that to someone you supposedly can't live without?
For her part, Bushnell admitted to People magazine that learning that Higgins said "I love you" to Fletcher was an emotional roller coaster, but both she and Higgins have committed to moving on.
And then there's Amanda Stanton. Maybe Higgins thought he was doing Stanton a favor by keeping her around and leading her on, but meeting her kids? Come on, man. He had to have known by then that she wasn't going to receive the final rose. Going home with her to meet her two small children — who are undoubtedly easily confused by the inner workings of an adult relationship, let alone a reality TV date — was just plain wrong. Especially since it was so clear how guarded Stanton is with her daughters.
And if I haven't made my case with the information above, let me leave you with this: After Bushnell mentioned to Higgins' mother that she felt he was seemingly perfect and too good to be true, his mom came back with, "We'll talk some more later... He can get pretty intense, he can get pretty worked up. I think it will take a special person to be patient with him in those times, to talk him off the ledge."
Not even Higgins' own mother buys the perfect The Bachelor image than has been spun for her son.
At the end of the day, I forgive Higgins for his transgressions. His missteps aren't uncommon — we've all done things to hurt people in our quest for everlasting love. But let's stop pretending that he's the nicest, most genuine human being to ever grace God's green earth. Because he's not.
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