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The Bachelorette slut-shamed for having sex on the show is getting out of hand

Katie McKay-Phillips is a freelance writer and the creator of Ruffled Feathers, an online wedding and event style brand. She lives in Chicago with her husband, son and two English bulldogs. Katie is a Highland Games competitor and streng...

Everyone's unfairly freaking out about Kaitlyn Bristowe having sex on The Bachelorette

Well, the wait is over. We now know that Kaitlyn Bristowe will be this season's Bachelorette.

And the season promo we saw last night contained some tidbits we need to have a quick conversation about. The way she was framed in that promo and the backlash about the revelation that she had sex with a guy on the show.

Everybody just chill out, OK? A woman is allowed to have sex, with whomever she chooses, whenever she chooses without being made to feel like it is a huge, world-ending deal, ashamed for what she did or embarrassed for making a decision to have consensual sex with another adult.

Now, it's a reality television show, so who knows which way is actually up in the show and what has been packaged and fed to us for dramatic effect?

More: How The Bachelorette plans to pull off having two women, instead of one

But what we do know is that the way Twitter reacted is seriously wrong. Fans of the show reacted with utter and belligerent bewilderment at this bombshell. Men had terrible chauvinistic things to say such as, "I'd be mad too if my girl had sex Unless it was… a cool celeb [sic]."

And then there was this gem, who doesn't have a problem with the sex so much as he has a problem with the timing, because he should be able to decide when it is appropriate for her to have sex.

The women had different issues. Of course, pitting the two contestants against each other, like women always seem to do.

More: The Bachelorette: 10 Things that happened behind-the-scenes

Some fans were quick to point out that all this negativity toward Kaitlyn is entirely ridiculous given the Bachelor/Bachelorette history.

Even host Chris Harrison points out the dichotomy between the Bachelor and the Bachelorette, saying, "If it were a guy, would it be any different? Part of the dynamic I love about this show is that there will be a debate and talk about this, and it's not such a bad thing."

Then, of course, we have those fans who not only rock, but they really get it. They understand not only women's right to sexual independence as well as totally getting the way these reality TV shows "work."

Totally with you, @JenelleRiley, totally with you.

More: Bachelorette Kaitlyn Bristowe reveals how she really felt about the twist

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