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Holly Madison reveals how awful life was in the Playboy Mansion

A celebrity gossip junky, Caroline Goddard has been writing entertainment news for longer than the world has known Kim Kardashian's name. Follow her on Twitter at @GoddardCaroline.

Life in the Playboy Mansion was so bad, Holly Madison contemplated suicide

Holly Madison is writing a tell-all about her life in the Playboy Mansion, and it sounds like it was pretty horrible.

In stark contrast to the fluffy, fun party lifestyle portrayed on the hit show The Girls Next Door, Madison says the reality was much darker.

In the press packet for the book Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny, publisher HarperCollins reveals, "Life inside the notorious Mansion wasn't a dream at all — and quickly became her nightmare. After losing her identity, her sense of self-worth and her hope for the future, Holly found herself sitting alone in a bathtub contemplating suicide."

The book will detail the "oppressive routine of strict rules, manipulation and [her] battles with ambitious, backstabbing bunnies," according to the release.

Supercute book cover for such a dreary tale, though.

Madison was the only one of Hefner's three girlfriends on The Girls Next Door — the other two were Kendra Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt — to share a bedroom with him, and she was desperate to marry him and have children. Hefner was reluctant to wed again, and the pair eventually split in 2009.

The blond bombshell went on to marry Pasquale Rotella and the couple have a daughter together, Rainbow Aurora. Madison's life obviously turned around, and she is enjoying happy days again.

"I’m excited to finally share my story and what I’ve learned from my personal experiences both inside and outside of the Playboy Mansion," Madison told Us Weekly. "I think my stories will surprise people, and I’m looking forward to lifting the veil of mystique and clearing up the misconceptions so often associated with my life."

Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny will be available in bookstores on June 23, 2015.

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