In her memoir, excerpted by People magazine, the American Idol judge dishes on the moment she knew she had to end her marriage to her third husband and father of her twins, Marc Anthony — and it happened whilst she was preparing for a photo shoot.
"As I sat there getting made up, my heart was beating out of my chest and I felt like I couldn't breathe... I became consumed with anxiety," Lopez recalled. "What was happening to me? I leaped from my chair and said to my dear manager Benny Medina, 'Benny, something is happening! I feel like I'm going crazy.' My mom was there and she rushed to my side too.
"It was one of those moments when you're so scared you can't even scream. In a blur of fear and panic, I looked at Benny and my mother and blurted out the words: 'I don't think I can be with Marc anymore.' Then I burst into tears," the mom of two recalled.
"It was out," Lopez recalls. "The thing I feared more than anything in the world. I collapsed into their arms and began to sob."
To the rest of the world, Lopez and Anthony appeared to have it all: two gorgeous twins, a seven-year marriage and music industry success — but that was not the case.
"Anybody looking from the outside in would have thought my life was great," the songstress wrote. "I had a husband and two beautiful children. I was on American Idol and my new single 'On the Floor' had gone to number one all over the world.
"What people didn't know was that life really wasn't that good. My relationship was falling apart and I was terrified."
True Love is set for release Nov. 4.
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