We've always known that the Doctor was old. Very old. However, during Doctor Who's most recent run, he's been portrayed by much younger men. Eccleston was my first Doctor — the one everyone says will always be your favorite. He looked too much like an ex-boyfriend, though. When Tennant came along, I fell fast and hard. Then, despite what friends told me, I was in no way, shape or form prepared for his regeneration into Matt Smith's version of the Doctor. He was so young. His hair was too floppy. He was too goofy. That first episode was good, and he was absolutely brilliant with young Amelia. But it still took a few episodes to fully pull me in. And then it happened. I was hooked.
And then it was time for a new Doctor. I was a bundle of mixed emotions. So far, I had yet to be let down. But how long could that last? Then again, it was hard to see Smith's Doctor with anyone other than the Ponds. Clara and Eleven weren't doing anything for me. Something had to change. As an American girl, I knew nothing about Capaldi when they announced him as the new Doctor. So I was still uneasy. It's been a wild ride, but it turns out getting used to Capaldi was easier than I thought... despite all the feels along the way. Wanna follow me through the phases?
The first flash of those eyes was a lot to handle. On the one hand, it was a reminder that we'd reached the end of Matt Smith's time. On the other, it was pretty cool to see him for just a split second, breaking the timey-wimey time travel rules to help out.
It felt so sudden! Despite the months of notice I had, the regeneration felt too soon. I didn't get enough time to say good-bye. Things weren't ending like they should. I wasn't ready for this old man.
That first episode, though. There were so many amazing jokes. So many great lines. It's as if Moffat knew we weren't properly ready for Capaldi's premiere and decided to help us out with witty banter. "These are attack eyebrows! You can take bottle tops off with these!" might just be the best line of the season.
"Clara, be my pal and tell me: Am I a good man?" With just one question, I fell for the Doctor. Not so much in love, but in a best friend sort of way. I wanted to be his friend... to help him answer the blasted question that was plaguing him.
"I think you're probably nice. Underneath it all, I think you're kind and definitely brave. I just wish you hadn't been a soldier," the Doctor explained to Danny. It was like the biggest hill on the roller coaster for me. After weeks of building Capaldi's Doctor up so high, I came plummeting back down. Sure, I knew the Doctor had never liked guns. He'd always been a little cold and distrusting of soldiers. He seemed to truly detest Danny, though, and it was a lot to swallow. And, yes, for a few minutes, I had a hard time separating the actor from the Doctor. It was a rough episode, OK? Don't hate.
The Doctor might still hate Danny, but he's swallowing down those feels. Like Danny figured out, it didn't matter if he's good enough for the Doctor, he need only be good enough for Clara. Most of the Doctor's saltiness is only because he's looking out for his friend.
All right. We know it's coming: The Doctor is slowly pushing Clara toward Danny. She will eventually do the opposite of what Rose did and choose her human over her Time Lord. While I've certainly shed tears at the loss of past companions, this one can't come soon enough. Capaldi has redeemed himself, but the Clara/Twelve team is still not enough. I'm ready for more.
How much longer must I wait?
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